Learning Contentment in the Now

Content adj. happy with one's lot; satisfied

This is so big for me right now. Here's why:

• I became a mom way before I thought I would be and, selfishly, was not ready to give up many of the things I knew being a good mom would require
• I always knew I wanted to stay at home once I had kids, but what I didn't think was my husband would be required to work two jobs demanding him work 60+ hours a week for this to happen
• I really want an iPhone or Smart Phone and find myself thinking about wanting one way. to. often.
• I love to eat out. I don't know why. It goes against my very nature of...well, I'm more of a baker than a cook...so never mind that. But I do really enjoy eating out. A lot. That's not really in the budget. A couple times a month, possibly, but one to two times per week...that would require I work or the hubs to aquire job #3. Not. worth. it.

However, what really got me thinking about contentment is my 2nd bullet: Ben's job.

You see, I've been thinking and praying a lot about how much Ben has to work while hoping God would provide a sole job to provide the way the two jobs do now. If it provides beyond that would be an extra blessing. I just am hoping for a solitary job to do exactly what the two are currently.

Just a few minutes ago I was thinking about that again. Probably the 645,209,300,000 time for me to do so. But as I was thinking I began wondering: is it possible for me to really hope for one job to do the trick and still be content with where I am (this is what got me thinking about my other bullets)?

As I pondered it a bit, I realized that I actually am getting to a place of contentment with where we are. God has and is teaching both of us a lot because of our current circumstances. He is stretching us in ways that would never have happened had Ben always had one, normal (by normal I mean 40 hours/week with minimal overtime, week nights and a majority of weekends off) job.

Yet, being content where I am, does not stop me from hoping that God will one day allow our family to have a more normal schedule. A schedule where my husband will be able to be more involved in his daughter's life. A schedule that would allow for him to spend time with guy friends on a more consistent basis. One where he feels a bit more free to have alone time.

Though I'm sure I will be spending more time thinking about the other points I wrote down, it was almost a healing balm to realize contentment does not quelch hope, they can almost go hand in hand.