But, I was wrong. (Well...if that wasn't a bit obvious, but still. Had to try for good measure :)
Because you see, Ben is very sneaky. And very forward.
After our only two real, conversation-invoking encounters, he knew he was attracted. So when I lost my phone, he was quick to hand out his phone.
And boy did God orchestrate which phone I took. I mean, I could have cared less which phone, I just needed one. And both Ben and Shane shoved their phones out for me to use. Yet, I grabbed Ben's.
I thought nothing of it and just enjoyed the company of lots of people as we continued to hang out that afternoon once the move was complete.
And though both of our brains are a little fuzzy on when he first texted me, we do know that there was at least almost a weeks time between his opporutnity to save my number and contacting me. Which was even more reason for me to believe that I had either heard God's voice wrong or Ben wasn't listening to God's voice. Either way, I thought for sure we'd never end up in a relationship.
(Side note: I wasn't pouting or anything over Ben not contacting me. And it wasn't like I had this perfect plan in my mind of how it would work. I just couldn't imagine how if from being around each other those two full days and some throughout the week, including a 2 1/2 hour conversation between just us after the group had gone to a movie, he wasn't asking for my number or trying to find ways to contact me [he was on FB back in those days] so that we could build a friendship, I saw no possibility for a dating relationship ever forming.)
And then sometime in the two weeks after the first move, I got a text. From Ben.
(Ummm...I'm starting to realize how fuzzy dates are and I think I need to correct what I've written in the other posts. We know for sure that we met Super Bowl Sunday in February 2009. However, as I think more about time frame, I'm also thinking that I was wrong in saying we moved his sister early March '09. I'm pretty sure that happened sometime in February. But exactly when, well it's all just some fuzzy dates now that don't matter.)
And we started hanging out. He would ask me over to watch Heroes. And would seek me out when our group of friends were together.
The more he sought me out, the more I knew in my spirit that I had heard God's voice right and indeed we would end up together if we kept pursuing Him.
And then, it happened.
Our church Youth Music & Drama program was putting on a production of Les Misérables. I had asked Ben's sister and her husband to join me and the rest of my family. They said yes and ended up inviting Ben, who also said yes. I had already planned on riding with Ben's sister and since we were all going to be together they asked Ben if he wanted to meet up with us too.
Thus we all enjoyed one another's company to the play, enjoyed the play, and then decided to enjoy some IHOP afterwards. (Oh, my! Typing that makes me want to go eat there. right. now!) By the time all was said and done, it was midnight when we got back to our cars and were about to head off.
But, Ben just couldn't keep his mouth shut ;) (Since many of you have not met Ben in person, I will elighten you: he is a talker. Much more so than my family likes to joke about me talking. However, I only talk when I'm comfortable. Ben...well, he can orrate long speals to anyone who will listen. And yes, I love and hate him for it :) And so we stood their talking for only God knows how long.
I was getting ready to say I needed to leave when Ben started getting a little awkward with his talking. I stood there wondering if I knew what he was going to say, but just waiting for him to say whetever it was he had to say. At the end of whatever he said, (no...i don't remember everything he said.) he asked me out.
And even though I had sworn I would never (Yeah...don't ever test God with that word. He will prove you wrong.) date anyone again who I hadn't known for longer than and been friends with for two years, I was the happiest girl on the planet in that moment.
Everything became fast after that: a few short months after we'd been dating he told me he loved me, though we have both said that sometimes we wish he'd have waited just a little longer. A few more months and we started talking about the idea of marriage and how that would play out with him finishing school and finding a job. And only 9 months after we started dating (Yep. It was short.), he popped the question, which though isn't a long story, will be saved for a post all it's own.
We planned our wedding over a 10 month period and the rest is history. We'll hit 3 years this coming October. And while marriage is hard and sometimes I want to flee like I'm trying to escape a plague (Just being honest here guys.), I wouldn't trade being married to Ben for the world. I love him more than I did yesterday, and as a general rule of thumb love the memories we make together.
And that is our story.
Showing posts with label Our Story. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Our Story. Show all posts
7.16.2013
6.24.2013
Defeated
So by now, you may think I'm crazy. I mean my last post on Ben's and my story unveiled a pretty crazy detail. (If you're just starting, I would recommend you read the back story, followed by the first part of our story.)
Honestly, I kind of thought I was crazy and maybe I had heard God's voice wrong. But, I kept on with life as normal.
And I just realized that I should back track a bit.
You see, Ben came back from a several week mission stint in China the Summer I moved to Baton Rouge. And he came back praying about going back to China for a year. However, shortly after school started up that Fall semester, he found out that if he didn't finish his degree by May 2010, he would not be able to earn it. Something about the Dean hadn't been keeping up with the accreditation for Art Education and so the program would be no more as of May 2010. When he found this information out, he felt God telling him to finish out the degree, rather than move forward with China at that time.
Had Ben gone to China, we likely would have never met. He would have been gone later that Fall semester. Which would have meant he wouldn't have shown up at the Super Bowl party that fine February of 2009. And the outfit my little sis insisted I wear wouldn't have left an impression on him along with my personality. (And yes, Ben still knows what I wore to that party. Ha!)
After that meeting, we really only saw each other in a quick passing by at church or me asking him where the other girls were sitting. I began to think I was ludicrous for ever thinking that we'd possibly be meant for one another. (I don't know a better statement to use, but I don't believe in the whole there is only one person in the universe you are made for. The person you are supposed to be with is the person you marry. Long story short.)
And then we both helped move his sister and her husband. It was a two weekend commitment because they had to move out of their old apartment, but the new apartment wasn't ready until the next weekend.
The first weekend in March of 2009 I spent plenty of time getting to know Ben, though it had nothing to do with me trying to pry my way into his life. I needed a ride and my original ride was cram full of stuff. Shane, who picked up on the fact I needed a ride, quickly piped up and asked me to ride with him and Ben. There was lots of laughter to be had by all and the multiple trips taken from the old apartment to Ben and Celeste's parents passed quickly.
Once the job was done, Ben's parents hosted all of us at there home for lunch as a thank you for helping. During the meal, I needed my phone, but couldn't find it even though it had recently been sitting on the table. When I asked for a phone so I could call it, Ben and Shane both shoved their phones into my face. I grabbed one, called my phone, and found it was in my chair.
Score: Blonde Moment - 1, Megan - 0.
Though I spent time riding around in Ben's truck as the group was hanging out, I went home that evening thinking that it would never work. Our paths would never be going the same direction. And I was honestly ok with that.
Honestly, I kind of thought I was crazy and maybe I had heard God's voice wrong. But, I kept on with life as normal.
And I just realized that I should back track a bit.
You see, Ben came back from a several week mission stint in China the Summer I moved to Baton Rouge. And he came back praying about going back to China for a year. However, shortly after school started up that Fall semester, he found out that if he didn't finish his degree by May 2010, he would not be able to earn it. Something about the Dean hadn't been keeping up with the accreditation for Art Education and so the program would be no more as of May 2010. When he found this information out, he felt God telling him to finish out the degree, rather than move forward with China at that time.
Had Ben gone to China, we likely would have never met. He would have been gone later that Fall semester. Which would have meant he wouldn't have shown up at the Super Bowl party that fine February of 2009. And the outfit my little sis insisted I wear wouldn't have left an impression on him along with my personality. (And yes, Ben still knows what I wore to that party. Ha!)
After that meeting, we really only saw each other in a quick passing by at church or me asking him where the other girls were sitting. I began to think I was ludicrous for ever thinking that we'd possibly be meant for one another. (I don't know a better statement to use, but I don't believe in the whole there is only one person in the universe you are made for. The person you are supposed to be with is the person you marry. Long story short.)
And then we both helped move his sister and her husband. It was a two weekend commitment because they had to move out of their old apartment, but the new apartment wasn't ready until the next weekend.
The first weekend in March of 2009 I spent plenty of time getting to know Ben, though it had nothing to do with me trying to pry my way into his life. I needed a ride and my original ride was cram full of stuff. Shane, who picked up on the fact I needed a ride, quickly piped up and asked me to ride with him and Ben. There was lots of laughter to be had by all and the multiple trips taken from the old apartment to Ben and Celeste's parents passed quickly.
Once the job was done, Ben's parents hosted all of us at there home for lunch as a thank you for helping. During the meal, I needed my phone, but couldn't find it even though it had recently been sitting on the table. When I asked for a phone so I could call it, Ben and Shane both shoved their phones into my face. I grabbed one, called my phone, and found it was in my chair.
Score: Blonde Moment - 1, Megan - 0.
Though I spent time riding around in Ben's truck as the group was hanging out, I went home that evening thinking that it would never work. Our paths would never be going the same direction. And I was honestly ok with that.
6.11.2013
Against All Odds
I promised I would start filling you guys in on our story. I started last week with some tidbits on my past. That pretty much catches you up to April/May of 2008. So that's where I'll start...
During this time in my life, I was doing a lot of emotional healing from having dated a guy for 2 1/2 years and the aftermath of a very unhealthy, but graciously short relationship. I happened to be building a really good relationship with one of my close guy friends and God was slowly bringing me back into a relationship with Him. (I must note that the slow part really had to do everything to do with me and my hurts and hesitation. God was being patient. Very patient.)
From the time my dad found out about his job transfer, my mom shamelessly begged me to move down to Baton Rouge. She would find any way she could to talk to me about searching for a job down there. I, however, was adament: I'm NOT moving to Baton Rouge. I wouldn't even turn my head in that direction to start looking for a job there.
During that Spring semester, guy #3 and I had become really good friends. I also thought I had found a job that would work out, if only I could land it. I thought things were looking up for me.
Guy #3 and I eventually started dating. When in the semester, I'm not really sure, but I know that we did. I do remember he was really sweet in the way he asked if he could pursue me. I really thought everything was going well and God was showing me I was right about staying in Little Rock. (Sometimes, I still wish I lived up there. I still want to move back to Arkansas. It's just so pretty up there! Trust me. I shamelessly ask Ben if he can move his job up there. :)
And then the job fell through. As in, I never got a call back. Not even the decency to say they'd chosen someone else.
*wah wah wah*
I was bummed. Severely.
By the point I knew I wasn't getting the job, I hadn't heard from anyone else. I couldn't find a job that would sustain me, let alone, bring in a small amount of income. I'm pretty sure I cried. I still had no desire to move to Baton Rouge.
Somewhere in May, during the middle of not hearing back and not finding anything else, I remember having a quiet time. I was frankly asking God what I was supposed to do and why on earth I wasn't finding anything in Little Rock. Why would You not provide something for me up here?! (Hmm...how nice of me to pin it to Him. The blame game. It works so well.)
It was in that time I will never forget Him whispering to my spirit these words:
"If you want to be in the center of my will, you will move to Baton Rouge."
WHAT?! You can't be serious. Please, please don't be serious.
Silence.
Oh. my. goodness. You're serious. But how on earth am I going to find a job there if I can't even find one where I live?
Trust me.
But...
Do you trust me?
...ok...I tru...ugh....I trust you. Your plans are best.
Within a weeks time, I had a temporary plan, had the possibility of a room mate, and a job that would let me live my dream for the Summer: working with horses. (You guys, I constantly tell Ben that if we ever have the money, I want one. I love horses. And yes, I've been thrown from one we were trying to re-saddle train. I love horses.) During that time, I would be able to try to find something more stable as well as pay a little better.
Time flew once I moved down there. Within a few short weeks, I was living with a girl who owned her home, I had a job that allowed for me to move up and paid well enough for me to live off of, and I was involved in a church. I was even starting to make friends. (Oh. By the way, I ended it with Guy #3, though he begged me to do long distance. I was not up for that as I hadn't had a great experience with it for 2 1/2 years. We both cried at the realization, but I also knew that it was for the best.)
As the months passed, I remember having several conversations with my mom about dating and the next guy. In so many words I told her I was fine if I was single for the rest of my life, though I still dreamed of getting married some day. (Umm...marriage is great, but why do we dream about the hardest aspects of life? As a kid we dream about becoming an adult, unaware of all the responsibility. We also dream about marriage with no realization that it is tough, hard work. Worth it? Most definitely, but it was nothing what I dreamed of as a kid.) I had honestly began dreaming about going back to school to get my BSN, RN. I dreamed about being a traveling nurse and maybe going to help in countries that would otherwise not have it. I truly was content with where I was in life and not in need of a guy. I kind of didn't want one.
Not too long after I had that conversation, I met Ben. He was friends with several of the people I was getting to know and he was involved in the collegiate ministry at our church. (No. I wasn't in college, but those were the people closest in age to me.) And I'm pretty sure around the 2nd or 3rd time I saw him (I'm talking we might have said "hi" to each other. And no, I wasn't all out attracted. He was cute, but my mind wasn't playing wedding bells), my spirit was moved. I heard God foreshadowing my future if Ben and I both stayed commited to our relationships with Christ.
So against all odds, I had gone from Little Rock to Baton Rouge. I had begun making friends with the group Ben hung out with. And God was giving me glimpses of a possible future for me. Needless to say, I was a bit in shock. And wondering how on earth that would work out considering I hardly knew the guy. Yet, I knew that I had questioned God before and He had proven Himself trustworthy.
I was slightly perturbed by this possible truth as I was just becoming comfortable with and LOVING single life. But I did what I knew God wanted me to do: waited. Waited to see how the story would unfold.
During this time in my life, I was doing a lot of emotional healing from having dated a guy for 2 1/2 years and the aftermath of a very unhealthy, but graciously short relationship. I happened to be building a really good relationship with one of my close guy friends and God was slowly bringing me back into a relationship with Him. (I must note that the slow part really had to do everything to do with me and my hurts and hesitation. God was being patient. Very patient.)
From the time my dad found out about his job transfer, my mom shamelessly begged me to move down to Baton Rouge. She would find any way she could to talk to me about searching for a job down there. I, however, was adament: I'm NOT moving to Baton Rouge. I wouldn't even turn my head in that direction to start looking for a job there.
During that Spring semester, guy #3 and I had become really good friends. I also thought I had found a job that would work out, if only I could land it. I thought things were looking up for me.
Guy #3 and I eventually started dating. When in the semester, I'm not really sure, but I know that we did. I do remember he was really sweet in the way he asked if he could pursue me. I really thought everything was going well and God was showing me I was right about staying in Little Rock. (Sometimes, I still wish I lived up there. I still want to move back to Arkansas. It's just so pretty up there! Trust me. I shamelessly ask Ben if he can move his job up there. :)
And then the job fell through. As in, I never got a call back. Not even the decency to say they'd chosen someone else.
*wah wah wah*
I was bummed. Severely.
By the point I knew I wasn't getting the job, I hadn't heard from anyone else. I couldn't find a job that would sustain me, let alone, bring in a small amount of income. I'm pretty sure I cried. I still had no desire to move to Baton Rouge.
Somewhere in May, during the middle of not hearing back and not finding anything else, I remember having a quiet time. I was frankly asking God what I was supposed to do and why on earth I wasn't finding anything in Little Rock. Why would You not provide something for me up here?! (Hmm...how nice of me to pin it to Him. The blame game. It works so well.)
It was in that time I will never forget Him whispering to my spirit these words:
"If you want to be in the center of my will, you will move to Baton Rouge."
WHAT?! You can't be serious. Please, please don't be serious.
Silence.
Oh. my. goodness. You're serious. But how on earth am I going to find a job there if I can't even find one where I live?
Trust me.
But...
Do you trust me?
...ok...I tru...ugh....I trust you. Your plans are best.
Within a weeks time, I had a temporary plan, had the possibility of a room mate, and a job that would let me live my dream for the Summer: working with horses. (You guys, I constantly tell Ben that if we ever have the money, I want one. I love horses. And yes, I've been thrown from one we were trying to re-saddle train. I love horses.) During that time, I would be able to try to find something more stable as well as pay a little better.
Time flew once I moved down there. Within a few short weeks, I was living with a girl who owned her home, I had a job that allowed for me to move up and paid well enough for me to live off of, and I was involved in a church. I was even starting to make friends. (Oh. By the way, I ended it with Guy #3, though he begged me to do long distance. I was not up for that as I hadn't had a great experience with it for 2 1/2 years. We both cried at the realization, but I also knew that it was for the best.)
As the months passed, I remember having several conversations with my mom about dating and the next guy. In so many words I told her I was fine if I was single for the rest of my life, though I still dreamed of getting married some day. (Umm...marriage is great, but why do we dream about the hardest aspects of life? As a kid we dream about becoming an adult, unaware of all the responsibility. We also dream about marriage with no realization that it is tough, hard work. Worth it? Most definitely, but it was nothing what I dreamed of as a kid.) I had honestly began dreaming about going back to school to get my BSN, RN. I dreamed about being a traveling nurse and maybe going to help in countries that would otherwise not have it. I truly was content with where I was in life and not in need of a guy. I kind of didn't want one.
Not too long after I had that conversation, I met Ben. He was friends with several of the people I was getting to know and he was involved in the collegiate ministry at our church. (No. I wasn't in college, but those were the people closest in age to me.) And I'm pretty sure around the 2nd or 3rd time I saw him (I'm talking we might have said "hi" to each other. And no, I wasn't all out attracted. He was cute, but my mind wasn't playing wedding bells), my spirit was moved. I heard God foreshadowing my future if Ben and I both stayed commited to our relationships with Christ.
So against all odds, I had gone from Little Rock to Baton Rouge. I had begun making friends with the group Ben hung out with. And God was giving me glimpses of a possible future for me. Needless to say, I was a bit in shock. And wondering how on earth that would work out considering I hardly knew the guy. Yet, I knew that I had questioned God before and He had proven Himself trustworthy.
I was slightly perturbed by this possible truth as I was just becoming comfortable with and LOVING single life. But I did what I knew God wanted me to do: waited. Waited to see how the story would unfold.
6.06.2013
A Little Background
So from my side of the picture, our story really begins about a year before I ever met Ben. And to catch you up to speed at that point let me give you some details prior to that:
1) My first, ever dating reltionship started just before my sophomore year of college. Though that relationship wasn't horrible, I knew within months we weren't supposed to be together. However, I was stupid and dragged it out because I thought maybe we could make it work (I was also listening to his pleas), so that when I finally cut it off, we'd been dating for 2 1/2 years. And the entire time we lived 500+ miles from each other. (We met at Keynote's, the music ministry of Campus Crusade Ministry, Summer Project.)
When I broke up with him just a month into my Senior year of college, I said I would never date long distance again and I would have to know my husband as just a friend for at least two years.
2) When I broke up with Guy #1 (yes, I'm leaving names out on purpose here), I hit the end of my anger rope, turned my back on God, and had an extremely unhealthy and by-God's-grace short relationship with my closest guy friend (Guy #2). He ended whatever it was we were, which I would guess was BF/GF though we never officially titled it, by the end of fall semester. (Funny how I used to define life by semesters. Can't do that anymore. :/)
I thought for sure I was going to die, that my heart would never fully recover from him leaving me. Keep in mind, at this point in my life, my relationship with Christ was meaningless to me and I could have cared less about what God thought of our relationship. I did not have the Rock to stand on, which I now seek to be my daily Anchor.
3) After I broke up with him, God slowly began to recapture my heart. In that time a few things happened:
a) My friendship with another guy (Guy #3) in my circle of friends really began to take root. He honestly was the best of any of the guys I'd been around for me. Before the semester was over we had gone on a few dates.
b) I was frantically searching for a job, hoping I could land something in Little Rock, AR, as I had called it home for 12 years. Plus, I love Arkansas, you guys! It's state motto accurately defines it as it is so full of natural beauty! I miss it and would love if Ben's job ever sent us back, especially if it sent us up to NWA where my sister and uncle's families are! Plus, I was curious to see where things were going to go with this Guy #3.
c) My dad found out his job would be moving the family back to Baton Rouge. I, however, was adamant that I was not moving down there! I would find a job in Arkansas and I would not be moving down to Louisiana. (Hmmmm...maybe I can just start telling people I'm from Arkansas. I've not known how to answer that question because I was born in Baton Rouge, didn't move to AR until I was 10, but stayed there 12 years before going back to BR. Ooops! I'm getting ahead of myself.)
And that catches you up to speed. I'm not going to start the story in this post, you'll just have to come back for more later :) (Plus, I think it'd probably become a ridiculously long post, which I am not always a fan of.)
1) My first, ever dating reltionship started just before my sophomore year of college. Though that relationship wasn't horrible, I knew within months we weren't supposed to be together. However, I was stupid and dragged it out because I thought maybe we could make it work (I was also listening to his pleas), so that when I finally cut it off, we'd been dating for 2 1/2 years. And the entire time we lived 500+ miles from each other. (We met at Keynote's, the music ministry of Campus Crusade Ministry, Summer Project.)
When I broke up with him just a month into my Senior year of college, I said I would never date long distance again and I would have to know my husband as just a friend for at least two years.
2) When I broke up with Guy #1 (yes, I'm leaving names out on purpose here), I hit the end of my anger rope, turned my back on God, and had an extremely unhealthy and by-God's-grace short relationship with my closest guy friend (Guy #2). He ended whatever it was we were, which I would guess was BF/GF though we never officially titled it, by the end of fall semester. (Funny how I used to define life by semesters. Can't do that anymore. :/)
I thought for sure I was going to die, that my heart would never fully recover from him leaving me. Keep in mind, at this point in my life, my relationship with Christ was meaningless to me and I could have cared less about what God thought of our relationship. I did not have the Rock to stand on, which I now seek to be my daily Anchor.
3) After I broke up with him, God slowly began to recapture my heart. In that time a few things happened:
a) My friendship with another guy (Guy #3) in my circle of friends really began to take root. He honestly was the best of any of the guys I'd been around for me. Before the semester was over we had gone on a few dates.
b) I was frantically searching for a job, hoping I could land something in Little Rock, AR, as I had called it home for 12 years. Plus, I love Arkansas, you guys! It's state motto accurately defines it as it is so full of natural beauty! I miss it and would love if Ben's job ever sent us back, especially if it sent us up to NWA where my sister and uncle's families are! Plus, I was curious to see where things were going to go with this Guy #3.
c) My dad found out his job would be moving the family back to Baton Rouge. I, however, was adamant that I was not moving down there! I would find a job in Arkansas and I would not be moving down to Louisiana. (Hmmmm...maybe I can just start telling people I'm from Arkansas. I've not known how to answer that question because I was born in Baton Rouge, didn't move to AR until I was 10, but stayed there 12 years before going back to BR. Ooops! I'm getting ahead of myself.)
And that catches you up to speed. I'm not going to start the story in this post, you'll just have to come back for more later :) (Plus, I think it'd probably become a ridiculously long post, which I am not always a fan of.)
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