Literary Junkies [v. 5]

I'm still not great at remembering to link up once a month with my fellow literary junkies. (Even though they send a reminder every month. I still forget...pretty lame, I know!) I don't think it helps I'm currently bogged down in reading for parenting/birth. I mean, it's not all the time people are looking to read books about birth...for real! Anyway, on to this month's questions...

1. What are you currently reading? Tell us a bit about it!

Well, I can tell you I just finished a really good book about grace, which I will be reviewing and having a giveaway for this Thursday. I have to admit as excited as I was about receiving this book to review, I had no idea just how much it would blow my mind out of the water. I don't want to say much here, because I want to save it for my post later this week, but I really believe Tullian has such an honest persepective of Grace vs. Law and communicates well how we've swung the pendulum too far to one side. Definitely worth reading!

2. What are your five most recent book purchases?

Well, I don't think many of you are going to care about my five most recent book purchases. Actually, one of my recent purchases is also a pretty good book. Also, I went back to check on Amazon what my most recent purchases were...let's just say we don't buy books a lot, because I am getting ready to read up on unmedicated child birth several of my purchases are to do with that, and also because of my last point I haven't had any desire to travel to the library to look for books for me. Plenty out there I want to read and probably would rather be reading, but this isn't really a list many are going to just jump on reading :) Plus, I have plenty of books here at home which I've not read. I'll start my list with my oldest purchase, up to my most recent:

1. Start by Jon Acuff (You guys, I bought this book for my husband for his birthday. His birthday was in April, or if you want to look at it another way, it's coming up again in April. Yeah...we haven't been spending money on books :/)
2. Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin (I must say I'm kind of looking forward to reading this one as everyone who has ever given birth unmedicated talks about this book. Curious to see what she has to say.)
3. Husband-Coached Childbirth: The Bradley Method of Natural Childbirth (Fifth Edition) by Robert A. Bradley, M.D. (Also looking forward to this one as I hated Lamaze. Curious to see what he says. Plus, this is another highly recommended among those who have given birth unmedicated.)
4. The Birth Book: Everything You Need to Know To Have a Safe and Satisfying Birth by William Sears, M.D. and Martha Sears, R.N. (Maybe you think I'm crazy by now, but I'm also looking forward to this book as I love the way the Sears write. [I read their Attachment Parenting book after having Zoë and feeling at the end of my rope. Something in me didn't 100% understand and/or connect with Babywise. And the book was a god-send!])
5. Love Does by Bob Goff (Though, like most non-fiction religious texts, I don't agree with everything he says, I really loved the stories he shares and his heart behind everything. I think it is a great book worth reading.)

3. Have you ever named/nicknamed anything (person, pet or thing) after a character? Who and why?

We named our aloe plant Inigo. When it started growing a second plant I think we named the other one Fezzik (spelling?). Can you tell I married a man who loves The Princess Bride?

4. If you could live in one book, with all of its characters and in the town, which would it be?

Goodness...I have no idea. I love the places in Chronicles of Narnia, but they don't stay there forever. Then there is the stinking awesome world of Harry Potter. Who wouldn't want to live in a wizarding community? I also really love Karen Kingsbury's Baxter Family Drama and could see myself really enjoying being a part of the Baxter family or an integrated part of it. I think where I would want to be though would change on a consistent basis. Sometimes I like the more fairytale, not real life, aspect of stories and other times I really enjoy the more real-to-life stories, the ones which seem a bit more in reach.

5. Can you think of a book you read that taught you something concrete you've never forgotten? Tell us about it.

You guys, I know I have, but my mind is just not coming up with anything. I've stared at my bookshelf. I've stared at this computer screen. I've sat and just tried to conjure up one concept/lesson I've learned from the many books I've read. Nothing. If I can think of something later, and remember to update this post, then I will let you know. Let's face it, I'm pregnant. That just isn't going to happen, so sorry to have nothing for you, but I really can't think of anything right now. Part of it is likely what I learned was so concrete it's become integrated into my life, thus I don't remember I learned it from what I read.

Literary Junkies [v. 4]

Oooi! I haven't done well continuing to link up with my Literary Junkies comrads here in the past few months. I'm not really sure why, but I really wanted to make sure I did for this months because I want to stay connected with my fellow "book lovers"! So I'm off to link-up with Taylor at Pink Heels Pink Truck and Lesley at By the Porchlight.

1. What are you currently reading? Tell us about it!

[via]

Ah...well, I'm trying to get myself into The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams. But did you notice I said trying?

I just can't seem to really pick up the feel of this book and though I pride myself on trudging through almost every book I've ever picked up (I couldn't finish Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison), I just am not sure that I could finish this one.

This would only make my "couldn't finish" number up to 2, out of I have no clue how many I've read. It just bothers me to start a book and not finish, unless of course you're given a bazillion books for College Lit and you only have to read excerpts. Then I'm ok with saying it's not really been "picked up" to begin with and will do so later in my life. When I feel like picking that particular book up.

[via]

I'm also slowly working my way through this book. Of course, this won't apply to everyone, but so far, I'm really enjoying this book.

I will say I generally don't buy parenting books. I may ask questions to people on Facebook or do some online research, but I'm not huge fan on just picking up every parenting book.

However, my mom bought this book for me and I thought I'd give it a shot. I come from a long line of yellers (don't worry, my mom would be the first to tell you). I mean we yell just to get someone's attention from across the house. But angry yelling also came into play at times. And I'm willing to bet our family isn't the only one like that. Or that we're the only family who it continues to travel down the line.

I'm not very far into this book, so really I'll have to let you know what I think once I'm either further in or completely finished...though I'm going to be the former will happen first. Ha!

2. What is one book you think every person should read at least once in their life? Why?

Oh dear. You know, I have to give a shout out to Melissa from Little Mrs. Married for my answer to this question. Had it not been for her recent post about this book, I'm likely to have forgotten how great it is, even though it's on my "I could and probably will definitely read this book again."

So you wanna know what it is?

[via]

Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers.

Oh you guys! Yes, this is an amazing Christian fictional work based off the book of Hosea from the Bible, but I'm willing to guess that anyone can enjoy this romance novel.

The story is one that pulls you in from the beginning and you just don't want to put the book down. It is full of a story of grace, unconditional love, and redemption. Just a truly beautiful piece of art! (After all, that is what literature is, right? Art?)

So so so good!









3. Do you think you could ever write a book? If so, what genre would it be?

Hmmm...I've thought I could. And I've started to write short stories. And then life happened. Or I've received some negative criticism that stuck with me from my teacher's in high school. Which I happen to keep playing over and over in my head.

But, maybe I should try again. And just see what happens as time progresses.

As for genre...I'm not really sure. It'd definitely be a fictional work. I'm not into history or anything of the sort.

4. Do you listen to audiobooks? Do you look for the same things in an audiobook that you do in one you'll read?

I have tried. I really struggle to stay awake and/or stay focused on listening. But honestly, if I'm going to listen to an audiobook, then I want it to be something that'd I'd read the hard copy of.

5. Can you suggest a book of each type for others to try:

Fantasy - Harry Potter Saga (Of course!) by J.K. Rowling and The Hobbit by J.R.R Tolkien

NonFiction - Columbine by Dave Cullen (Please note: this is a heavy, heavy read, but from the way it was written I think they're really telling the truth that Cullen took his time doing research. A lot of effort went in to shedding light on all that actually happened.)

Fiction - The Bourne Identity by Robert Ludlum

Romance - Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers falls into this category (Yep. I'm using it twice.)

Classics - The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde

Young Adult - The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants by Ann Brashares

And that wraps up this months Literary Junkies. If you are a fellow book lover, feel free to hop on over and link up! Love to hear what you have to say about books you're reading or have read.

Bits About Me

If you look on my sidebar, you will see a button for the Texas Women Bloggers. Though I'm not the best with keeping up with everything going on over there, I do try to participate in their link-ups. And so today, I'm participating in their Getting to Know You link-up.

1. What part of Texas do you call home? Though I'm new to Texas (just moved here last November...woah! We'll be closing in on a year here soon!), I already am calling Houston home. We like it here and have no plans to ever go back to Baton Rouge. Whether or not we'll actually stay here, we know that it would be an act of God to get us back in Louisiana. 2. How long have you been blogging? Well, so I originally started blogging in 2007 when I was going through a rough patch in college. I've thought about deleting all those posts, but if there is one thing I've learned is to not try to erase the past but learn what you can from it. I don't anything I wrote was inappropriate, I just know that I've grown a lot since then. My blogging kind of waned for a while and then I "restarted" when my older sister encouraged me to blog to document my pregnancy and life with my now precious 17 month old. 3. Why did you start blogging? Ha! Accidentally kind of answered that in the last question. When I first started it was to get my thoughts out. When I tried my hand at it to blog regularly again, it was to document life with Zoë. 4. When we visit your blog, what can we expect to discover? Unfortunately, to see a pic of me and my family you need to go to my about me page. Hoping to change that here in the near future so you're greeted by my smiling face when you first stop by. You will quickly see my tabs on my family and a tab about books. I love my family and probably talk about them almost as much as I talk about my relationship with Jesus. Books...well, I love to read and so if my current pregnancy and 17 month old haven't completely stolen my brain then I will inform you on what I'm reading and what I do/don't like about it. (You can read my recent announcement and answer to Q's asked regarding this pregnancy here and here.) So pretty much you're going to find that I'm an open book who talks about almost anything and everything here and my relationship with Christ permeates it all. 5. How did you come up with your Blog Title and what is its meaning? I really struggled with coming up with something catchy I liked that I would be able to keep no matter how life changed over here. I'm not saying that I haven't thought about changing the title, just because it isn't that artsy and I love the arts (I mean, I'm a pianist, I married an artist, and though I'm not great at either, I enjoy dabbling in poetry and creative writing), but for now Tidbits From My World works. I finally landed on it when I realized that I was pretty much going to be sharing just that: tidbits. I can't completely write a minute by minute play of my life and there are some aspects that I believe should remain personal. However, those pieces that I want to share are tidbits that give you a glimpse into my little corner of the world. And thus, the name was born. 6. What do you love about being part of Texas Women Bloggers? Hmmm...well, I'm really new to all this. And I haven't looked around it or found other bloggers through it was much as I would like to say I have, but one thing I've loved is when pictures are shared from all around this beautiful state for Wordless Wednseday. Makes me fall even more in love with the state of Texas. 7. Who inspired you to blog? Well, the bloggers that I am almost always looking to read and find can sometimes give me great ideas for post, whether they know it or not are the following (in no certain order):

• my older sister, Lindsey, over at A Dollop of My Life
• Melissa over at Little Mrs. Married
• Laura over at A Hearty Overflow
• Kayla over at Kayla Danelle
• Amy over at Taking Steps Home

These ladies generally write posts that make me want to become a better writer and type thoughts and life events into posts.

8. If you could pick a favorite post from this past year, what would it be?

Oh goodness. I haven't read any of my posts from the past year. To help me pick one, I'm going to consider "this past year" to be any post written in 2012. And as such, there are three posts that tie it. I just can't really pick one. One is ridiculously simple but made an announcement that has changed my life, in the best way possible, forever. Another documents the first birth story I have, which also left me asking a lot of questions for the next time I was planning for a birth. And the last, well it documents a story that still cracks me up to this day, so even though it may not be by best writing, I enjoy sharing it.

Looking forward to see what others have put in their link-up posts!

Happy Thursday everyone!

Frankly Friday [v. 8]

Another Frankly Friday with Amy!

This may be a quick post. It may not be.
But I just want to get my thoughts out there after reading the first two books of the Bible, Genesis and Exodus.
As a Christ-follower I frequently hear people say, and I firmly believe, that all of life is about God being glorified. And He will be glorified even if you try to go against His will. (There are several biblical stories as well as many people I have met currently living who are testament to that. Just read Exodus 4-15. That's one of many, with several preceding it.) However, one of the newer lines of thinking I've been introduced to is really trying to see the "God" moments in your life, to see how He is weaving your story even if it feels like maybe He couldn't design it this way or you get lost in your humanness and life is just so good you start taking credit. The bottom line is taking time to see how He is working in your life so that He may be glorified.
Anyway, I had decided recently to try to read through the Bible in a year again. I've done it once and enjoy doing it on occasion just because it gives a big picture rather than taking a small snap shot and focusing on it.
As I've read, I keep seeing how the story really isn't about Adam or Noah or Abraham or any of the other patriarchs or other "main" characters. Really it's all about how God is using those people to Himself be glorified. And I've been blown away. How I've missed this before, I'm not really sure, but it makes even the most boring of texts (read: Leviticus [book of laws] and Numbers [literally a census of the people]) become interesting. I knew before that it was about God, that it really wasn't about these people, though there are lessons we can learn from them, and really about nothing other than Him. But to actually read it in that light, well I'm really enjoying it.
It's refreshing. It's uplifting to my spirit. And I hope that as long as I am able to read, the Bible continues to show me more of how God weaves Himself into every story and is glorified.

Frankly Friday v. 7

Linking up with Amy for Frankly Friday :)



Ahh. Alas, it is Friday. I'm not even sure why I care because that means nothing to me. I will wake up and be a mommy all over again tomorrow.

Oh wow...I'm kind of complaining about that. Maybe writing a post when my eyes are heavy and my head wishes for a pillow isn't such a great idea. Because truth told, I love being a mommy. I wouldn't trade it for the world. But just like any good ol' job, there are bound to be moments my humanness (is that a word? Oh well...I just made it one if it isn't.) comes out and I complain about the lot I'm living.

Just keepin' it real.

Because something that has crossed my mind a lot lately is how little days of the week, or even holidays for that matter, really mean to me. Typically, if you were to ask me what day it was, I'm not going to know unless I've had a prior engagement or some kind of appointment to keep.

You guys, I'm being so serious that I have a wonderfully, funny story to share with you about July 4th.

Because well, as stated above, days of the week and holidays aren't on my radar on a consistent basis. I guess this means that I'm only going to keep up with Easter, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Other holidays just well, let me tell you my little story.

So it's 5 am on the 4th of July. Ben had been seeming like he was getting sick so I banned him to the couch for the night. We didn't want to risk me getting whatever it was. (Maybe we're weird. We're weird.) Even though I'd banished him from our room, I'd forgotten to turn off the alarm. Why on earth would I want to wake up at 5 if he's not in the room? He's old enough to know to set his phone alaram, right?

Either way, I forgot.

So I got an unwarranted, unwanted wake-up call at 5 am.

Silence from the living room.

I fall back asleep after punching the snooze button.

I wake 10 minutes later to still see pitch black from out my bedroom door. I hear no sounds coming from the bathroom. And I still haven't heard a single sound from the living room.

Being the good wife that I am, I took it upon myself to groggily make my way out of bed and moan at Ben that he should be getting up. Right now! He moaned some response and semi-started moving.

I thought that maybe it was his normal morning slowly waking up routine and frustratingly shuffle back to bed to cozy under the covers and try to enjoy another hour of sleep.

By this point, I've forgotten that I've already reset the snooze on the alarm. And anger ensues the next time it goes off.

I have no. grace. for him now. I move myself to the living room as fast as possible. The second I'm next to the couch, I immediately bark, "Do you KNOW what TIME it is?! You're going to be late for work! Why didn't you set an alaram for yourself!?!?!"

He rolls over. Stares at me. And figures out that I'm crazy because, "Megan...it's the 4th of JULY!"

HELLO?!? Earth to Megan? Are you even aware that many workers are given the day off for this should-never-be-forgotten holiday? Where has your brain gone since you've entered the land of mommyhood?

Yep. That happened. Just a few short weeks ago. (And now I'm lamenting the fact that time seems to be flying and yet it's moving at a snails pace. I'm telling you, time is no longer my friend. Wait. Was it ever?)

So back to my point - days and holidays aren't on my radar.

While that isn't necessarily a bad thing, there isn't any great reason that I've lost track. The prideful, look-at-me part of myself wants to be able to tell you it's because I realize that days don't really matter, what matters is keeping my focus solely on Jesus and living every minute I have for Him and the purpose He's placed me here for - to make Him known and declare His glory. To tell you that the reason I forget days is because all I care about is Him, that would be wonderful.

But it's so. not. true.

In fact, it's not even the first thing I think about when I wake up in the morning. (Jesus, how I need you! How I need you!!)

That is a humbling thought.

And while I'm just processing all this now, some part of me knows it's only the beginning. I'm no where near telling you how this realization is going to change my journey.

What I can say it that I hope I will look back on this and see how God has used this thought process to mold me more into His image. To make me more dependent on Him. To help me remember that every moment I am given is to be used for Him and to constantly be in communion with Him seeking His guidance so those moments truly are for Him and Him alone.

Frankly Friday v. 6

Linking up with the lovely Amy for another Frankly Friday :)

• frankly, all I have for you is a bunch of bullets in looking back on my week. it's been a while since it's only been bullets, so here goes :)
• this week was crazy busy in that I had to get to my church for VBS every day by 8:30. This was a feat, in my opinion, considering I've been exhausted, VBS only increased the latter, and I, on most days, was bringing myself, a 10 year old, and a 16 month old. No, it isn't several kids under the age of 4, but still, I found this to be a God-worked miracle.
• I'm still amazed by how well my Zo Zo is walking. She went from nothing without assistance to almost sheer perfection in a weeks time. And to be honest, apparently she wasn't that wobbly for a "beginner", says many been-there-done-that moms.
• I'm also impressed with the fact that the day she started walking was also the very first day she got herself from sitting to standing without any assistance. It's as if she had calculated all it would take, knew she was ready, and did it.
• This leads me to my next bullet: the complete realization Ben and I have had this week that our child is very calculated in everything she does. If it's going to be done, she wants it to be done right. And she gets very frustrated with herself or with whoever she has deemed worthy of helping her at the time if it isn't done just so. Ben keeps saying she's my child, and though have been like that since I can remember, we were also told that Ben used to be that way with some stuff as a kid. So she may grow out of it...or not.
• I am so excited about going to visit some of my family in NWA! I love getting to spend time. Yay for time with all the sisters together!! (My lil sis and her new hubby are going to be up there too!!!) Bummed our brother can't join us :( We will miss you Jeff!
• That said, I'm hoping the drive tomorrow goes well. Hopefully the swap of Little Miss' car seat from rear to forward facing will help. She seems much more content getting to look out. Maybe this will mean no fussy sessions in the car. I can dream, right?

Annd that's about all my brain is giving me right now. Hope everyone had a lovely week and enjoys their weekend!

This Weekend, I... [v. 5]

I think I could make this my mantra these days -> I want to write, but I'm not sure what to write, staring at the computer screen is doing nothing.

I'm beginning to wonder if I'd churn out my best work in the early hours of the morning or the late hours of the evening. However, my mind, for whatever reason, feels that getting up in the wee hours of the morning means going to bed oober early; of which, I am no fan. On the other end, staying up late would mean getting to at least sleep until 8 am, but I haven't seen one of those days in almost 2 years. (That is, I can say 2 years if you count when I was pregnant with Zoë because I don't count getting up every couple hours to pee and sleeping until 8 as truly getting to sleep until 8. Period. And that would have only been on the weekends. I worked unti the day I had her.) I like the idea of staying up late, just not the lack of sleep I will have because of it. Also, I already get up around 530/6ish so I can hopefully have at least an hour of time to myself for journaling, prayer, time in the word; truly so I can have quiet, uninterrupted worship however I feel God leads.

Maybe I have writers block. Or toddler block - I am currently listening to Zoë work out whether she is going to fight sleep or actually get the good nap that her eyes have told me she's been dreaming of all morning. (No. We haven't dropped morning nap. She just barely napped this morning.) There are too many noise distractions going on to properly clearly head. (Another argument for writing either early or late in the day.)

All this to say, that today, I'm going to give you my best, and today, my best is bulleting out what our weekend looked like.

Oh! *lightbulb turns on* I'm going to link up with Sar and Syndal , because they have a link-up just for bulleting out the weekend. Perfect!

This Weekend, I took Zoë to see a production of The Jungle Book at Miller Theater. As much as I'm already a fan of free shows displaying different forms of the arts, I'm not a fan that it is blistering hot already. I'm not sure we'll be seeing another day show during the summer. However, I am very much grateful for this theater and look forward to seeing more shows in the Fall/Winter months. She actually enjoyed a majority of the show, danced to the little bit of music that there was, and then was d.o.n.e. Thankfully, that was closer to the end of the show and she was content standing while holding on to the  back of the chair in front of her. (We knew who was sitting in front of us so we weren't being rude. It was another kid who was almost scooted the entire way forward.) And what little I could pay attention to, I enjoyed as well. This Weekend, I went on the routine grocery shopping trip with Ben and Zoë. I'm not sure why Ben enjoys going grocery shopping with me, but every now and then, I actually enjoy making it a "family outing". I say "every now and then" because sometimes it is the only time I get to myself. And though I'm not a huge fan of grocery shopping, the time to myself is a rare commodity I would pay for if I had to. This Weekend, I baked these delicious muffins. We had a Sunday Social in our Sunday school class yesterday. Everyone was asked to bring a breakfast item. I honestly had forgotten about it until my friend Kristy reminded me Friday. When I was racking my brain friday night, I remembered I had everything I needed for these. I made the dough Saturday night, refrigerated it, and baked it on Sunday morning. Yummy! This Weekend, I went to volunteer training for our church's VBS. Though Zoë is too young to partcipate, I saw no reason why I couldn't help, especially as they have childcare for the younger kids of the volunteers. Though it's a bit awkward to look at and learn some of the songs and motions we'll be singing all week without the kids there, it was a lot of fun. I'm so excited about being able to pour into some of the younger generations! That about wraps it up over here. Nothing fancy, but many times, I'm ok with that. We're low key kind of people, especially with the Summer pounding on our door. I think it's trying to slip in through whatever cracks it can find in our old dwelling. Hope everyone's weekend treated them well!

Frankly Friday [v. 5]

I couldn't resist. I wanted to do both today. Especially because I have the happiest Frankly Friday ever; at least, for myself I do. So I'll begin with my link up for Frankly Friday. Amy at Taking Steps Home hosts this link up and if you don't already know her, you should! She's sweet, genuine, and just an all around great blogger to get to know. That said...

For this, I have to say that my daughter is the cutest! The video that follows will prove such :) (I'm not biased at all.) And frankly, I'm pretty sure I'm one blessed mom! I'll take all the bad and good days with her. The one thing I hate is that I don't have an updated video. Here's what I mean: Zoë has been all over learning animal sounds. When I took this video, she had clearly learned duck (I'm honestly not sure where she gathered that one as it hasn't been a frequent sound correlation I've shown her and it isn't in the book we've been reading), cow, dog, and cat. The latter three have been frequently practiced because of a really cute book we're borrowing from the library: Hello, Day! by Anita Lobel. She now will do elephant with a ridiculously cute arm trunk (this was learned between her Little People Zoo Talkers Zoo - which I LOVE, by the way- and me showing her :) and has added rabbit, too. (The book says "The rabbit says 'Pr Pr Pr.'" Cute, huh?) Anyway, without further adieu, here's the video:

Life isn't always easy being a mom. Any mom can tell you this. Actually, any good nanny can tell you this. If you've worked with kids consistently, there are plenty of times you want to join them in their pity party. (Or is that just me?) There are many times you can find yourself wanting to succumb to feelings of anger, frustration, self-doubt, incompetence, you name it and throw in the towel. And yet, when you don't, when you choose to look at the many, many blessings that come from all the hard work, you remember how worth it is. You remember that the gift of having a tiny human blessing far outweighs any bad days you may see. And that is one reminder that keeps me going at the end of the days I want to throw in that towel hard.

Frankly Friday - Bullet Style

You guys, it's late, but I feel like writing. Well, bulleting. Or maybe it will become a post. I'm not sure. However, either way it goes, I know this is going to be a "frank" post so I'm linking up with Amy from Taking Steps Home.

• I have been extremely tired as of late. I'm not sure if it's because I'm not keeping a regular bed time or what, but I feel like I could sleep. A lot.
• I've contemplated blocking all my social media accounts and not keeping up with many of the blogs I follow because babies seem to be popping out left and right like we're rabbits. (Sorry if that offends anyone. They're just EVERYWHERE!) Sometimes, I'm not sure if my heart needs to continually feel the pain in order to heal or if it's just making it worse. Because not only are people getting pregnant or having babies left and right and being announced via social media and blogs, my sister just had a baby (Yes, I love my nephew! Doesn't make me want to steal him though...just kidding...sort of...) and there are babies and pregnant people all over Walmart. And Aldi. And the mall. And EVERYWHERE. Did I say they were everywhere? My heart seems to crumble every time.

The hard part of it is that I genuinely want to be happy for these people. New life is such a huge     blessing, but that is also part of what makes it so stinkin' difficult to watch - my heart craves to know that I'm nurturing a little life inside of me right now. And sometimes I'm just not sure if I can take it anymore.

Then I realize that if I were to remove myself from it for a time, I'd just have to reenter it again in the future, so why not work through it now. It isn't the easiest of realities and it floods me with many emotions. Yet, I am grateful for a God who heals and who has given me scripture to cling to - His very words through those divinely inspired.

I may still battle with this decision. I may feel led to be absent for a while, but at this time, I'm not going anywhere.

• I'm loving interacting with Zoë these days. She is growing so much and really beginning to understand the spoken word. She shakes her head "no" to so many questions. She also loves loves loves to talk as though she were really communicating. Unfortunately, it's all just a bunch of baby garble. It's going to be a lot of fun when she truly realizes she can't actually communicate whatever it is she's saying. I'm sure some tantrums are going to come out. She is very particular and wants to get stuff right. (Boy, oh boy, is she my child...Yikes!
• I know people say not to push your child when it comes to walking (before I get farther, let me say I'M NOT!), but I am loving watching her learn. She loves walking. As such, she frequently will come up to me, point to my hands, grab hold of them (fits are pitched if she can't get just. the. right. hold.), and proudly start walking with her arms above her head to hold on to me. Also, though I want her to be independent of me, I am loving just how much she wants me to be with her while she learns. She refuses to practice on her own, couches or other objects are no longer good enough. And if she has a choice of me or her daddy, she chooses me every time. Not that I don't want her to get that time with her daddy, I do. (Almost every day I suggest he take her outside to practice if he'd like. Then I'm not in the way and he can spend time with her.) And not that I don't need a break, because I know many times the words come flying out of my mouth, "Why do you want me?! I've been with you all day." But even with that need, I find myself enjoying knowing she wants me, that as horrible a mom I feel at times, I'm obviously doing my best to care for her and she knows it.

I think that about wraps up what's going on in my mind right now. I hope everyone enjoyed their Friday. If you are traveling, I'm praying for your safety!

Enjoy your Memorial Day weekend, everyone!

Literary Junkies [v. 3]

It's that time again!

Wait...

What am I saying? I haven't really participated in the link-up for Literary Junkies that frequently. I've only done it two other times. So I don't think I'm entitled to start with the sentence I was going to.

Anyway, I am going to be linking with Taylor and Lesley for the LJ post this month. And since I've got a brand, spankin' new library card, I think I may join in on their book club if I can nab a copy of the book their reading, though who knows if I'll actually be able to read through the books. I may be up for the challenge. I'll let you know!

1) What are you currently reading? Tell us about it.

[source]

Well, I'm going to be s.l.o.w.l.y. working my way through The Power of  Praying Wife by Stormie Omartian. If you follow my blog, you already know this. For newcomers, you can read the posts I've written so far by going here. 

Oh and by slowly, I mean I won't be finished with it until the end of November.

However, it's worth it to me as it's encouraging me to commit myself to praying for husband on a daily basis with a focus for each week.

I love how Stormie writes because if she isn't sharing her own story she's sharing someone elses. It helps remind me that I'm not the only one who needs her words to help jump start my lacking prayer life for the hubs. (Honestly, in general.) She gives some very practical, down-to-earth advice on what to focus on within each topic. And it is all biblically based, which is of utmost importance to me. I love how she saturates what she's bringing to the table with it. Good stuff.

I'm also reading...hang on...I can't remember the title becauase I never looked at it except for when I downloaded it.

...

...this:

[source]

I had liked a facebook page for Gospel eBooks a while back. My older sister had told me they daily post great deals on Christian literature along with free books, too. This book happened to pop across my feed one day so I decided to download it.

It if a farely easy read, but it has completely captured my attention. I'm not sure if it's the stubborn, hot-tempered Madeline or the sweet, going-against-the-grain Devlin who have captured me more, but whoever it is, I find myself wanting to pick up my Kindle even when my inner being is crying for me to hold paper. Though it is farely predictable, I'm ok with that as my daughter and I are finally on the other  side of mending from being sick off and on between the two of us for almost a month now. And even with its predictability, I find that the characters invite you in, making you feel as though you are the fly on the wall, which I love. Entering another world is one of the many reasons I enjoy reading and this book offers just that.

2) Summer is just ahead and my fav thing to fantasize is laying in a hammock with a good book. What are you top 3 fav "summer" reads?

Oh my. I'm such a reader that I'm not certain I'd really go back to reread anything. Even if I loved it. So I'm going to pick the first three that come to my head.

First up, is Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis. I just love how he wrote from the standpoint of Satan's workers trying to lead astray a Christ-follower. Plus, C.S. Lewis has so many great insights scattered throughout and the way they are said captivates my mind.

The next book that comes to mind would be The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver. Very interesting book. It's been a while since I've read this one so I can't really give you a synopsis on it, but if I reread books, I'm know this would be in my stack.

And finally, but most certainly not least of any of these, Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoyevsky. It's also been forever since I've read this one. I know that it follows a criminal and essentially gives you a look into his thoughts. Aside from that, I can't really remember. I just know I am continually telling my husband how much I enjoyed reading it in High School, would love to read it again, and that he needs to read it because he never has. So there. Ha!

3) What are your top 3 summer "to-reads"?

Ummm...

I have no clue.

If I had to guess, I will say these three, in no particular order:

     1) She's Gonna Blow by Julie Ann Barnhill - Yes, I struggle with anger. Yes, I find myself working over-time to keep from taking it out on my child. No, I'm not joking. Yes, I'm going and doing something about it. No, I've never harmed my daughter, but I know that if I don't do something about it, I am just as capable as any other human to lose their temper and doing something I would deeply regret. Only by God's grace. And I know I'm not the only one who struggles with it. (Hence, the book. I think if I was the only one, I wouldn't have that book for help.)

     2) 1000 Gifts by Ann Voskamp - I'm waiting on the copy I recently won to arrive in the mail. I cannot wait to read this book as I've heard nothing but great things about it. I also love that it's entire point is to hone in on all the gifts we are surrounded by and how they all point back to a God who loves to lavish us, even in the seemingly trivial and small things that we take for granted. (Heck. I take for granted the roof over my head. That is not small or trivial. But I digress.)

     3) START. by Jon Acuff - I am already in love with this book. You see, my sister had a Blissdom exclusive copy when I went to visit her early in April. (I actually like her copy more than my husbands because its my favorite type of paperback binding. Weird? Maybe. But I'm not a big fan of hardback. Anyway...) And so while I visited her just a few short weeks before it was released to the less fortunate (aka those who didn't go to Blissdom), I found I just. couldn't. put. it. down. Seriously. She was always finding me with it in my hands if there was any silence to be spared. Or even if a ruckus was being made. I was trying to soak up as much of its goodness as could be. I didn't have enough time to finish it, but since I pre-ordered my hubs copy, we also have a eBook copy. SCORE! Oh you bet that sucker is being read before summer is over. Can. not. wait!

4) What book do you wish they'd make a movie of?

None.

Seriously.

Though I know they've made some great movies that do a decent job of capturing the book and I love (read: Harry Potter), I never have found myself sitting around hoping they will make a movie based off of a book. Because, generally speaking, the book wins. Every time. And many times, after I've read the book, I can never watch the movie again (ie Born Identity). It's a rare case for me to watch the movie again. And so I don't have any books I wish they'd make into movies. 

The end.

5) Has your favorite author published a book lately or going to publish a book soon? Tell us about it.

I'm not sure who my favorite author is.

But since I can definitely pin point my favorite children's author, that is for young children, ages 0 to 5/6, I will share that with you.

Our favorite children's author is Sandra Boynton.

Oh, and I had to ask Ben what her age range is. His answer: "0 to 85." She's that good guys. They're catchy, so they're extremely easy to memorize.

You think that last piece of info is bad? It isn't when you have a toddler who turns the page every .5 seconds. You can recite the entire book as she flips through it 10 times in a sitting.

Plus, they are either plain silly, silly with a good lesson to learn or way to teach a topic (letters, numbers, opposites, animals, etc), or a cute way to teach a lesson. Wait. They're all kind of silly. But either way, they're all stinking cute! I find myself hoping that Zoë brings me any of the Boynton books we have. Ha!

Now, back to adult convo...favorite author...

You know, I'm just going to go with Karen Kingsbury because I own a ton of her books. And honestly, I wouldn't have a book to give you guys if I didn't choose someone current because my other favorites have long sinced passed away. (Fyodor Dostoevsky and C.S. Lewis. I seriously love both of their writing.)

And she just released a new book:

[source]

Since I know absolutely nothing about it, I'm going to copy and paste the synopsis up on her website (the source for the image takes you there):

"The Chance is a heartwarming story about childhood friends, broken lives, and a long ago promise that just might offer the hope of love for today. In The Chance, Karen delves deeply into a theme that resonates with us all: It’s never too late for those willing to take a chance.

Years ago, the day before Ellie moved from Georgia to California, she and her best friend Nolan sat beneath the Spanish moss of an ancient oak tree where they wrote letters to each other, and sealed them in a rusty old metal box. The plan was to return eleven years later and read them. But now, as that date arrives, much has changed. Ellie, bereft of the faith she grew up with, is a single mom living in a tired apartment trying to make ends meet. Sometimes she watches television to catch a glimpse of her old friend —Nolan, now an NBA star, whose terrible personal tragedies fueled his faith and athletic drive in equal measure. But Nolan also suffers from a transcendent loneliness that nothing has ever eased.

In their separate lives, as Ellie and Nolan move toward the possibility of a reunion at the oak tree, Kingsbury weaves a tale of heart-wrenching loss, the power of faith, and the wounds that only love can heal."

Knowing how much I always find myself sucked into her books, I'm guessing this one will be nothing less.

I'm a bit surprised at how much I was able to crank out for this post. I guess if you get me talking about books, I can go for a while. Only proves that I love them!

That's Awkward

*Update: I also noticed (literally just noticed...yeah. I'm not sure where my brain has hidden itself.) that today should be SSMT 2013 #10. I may or may not get to that later today. Looks like I'm gonna have a two post day around here somewhere. Cest la vie.*

Oh yes. I couldn't resist. And so I'm moving my PoPW post to Thursday. If you've been following that, don't worry. I really will be posting it tomorrow. If you haven't, you can catch up here and here.

Anywho, I wanted to link up with Amy for her The Awkward Years link-up. Too fun to pass up.

*Side note* Is it just me or is even the word "awkward", well, awkward? *end Side note* I have no clue exactly how others are doing this, but I thought I'd share a couple of photos. Only one of them is slightly embarassing to mass produce (read: post online for anyone to see). The rest were bits and pieces of me that I found awkward through my middle and high school years. So, let's get to it. First up:

The arrows are all pointing to me. (How unfortunate! Ha!) Let me explain the numbers. (Oh and by the way, I defaced everyone because I didn't stay in touch with most of these people and don't know if they'd want this displayed on the internet. [aka I spared them the embarrassment :)])

1) I still had bangs. This was the 90s so maybe that still kind of fit in back then, but out of all those marked out faces, I think only 3 of us had bangs. Yeah. I was behind the times. (Though I'm pretty sure at this point I had already been pleading with my mom to let me grow them out. We still can't figure out why it took so long for her to get on board me as both my younger and older sister had grown theirs out. Weird.) (Also, I know bangs are coming back. I just am no fan of them for myself and wanted off that band wagon a long time ago. Nothing against them, and many people rock them, they just aren't for me.)

2) Ummm...that outfit. Yeah. I think it speaks for itself.

3) Notice out of all those feet I'm the only one rocking keds knock-off shoes. And colored socks. You guys, for F.O.R.E.V.E.R. I had to have socks that matched my outfit. Thankfully, I'd bypassed my sock rolling years by the time this photo was taken. (I'm talking literally rolled down. Not just folded over. *face meet palm* And no, I have no photo to show you. Betchya my mom does though.) Unfortunately, I missed the "pull your socks as high up as they go" band wagon. I liked to fold them over. Don't ask. I don't know. And I will forever only buy my child no-show socks for summer time. She can find some other way to embarrass herself. (read: embarrass me...I'm already asking God for the grace to let her be her own person and not worry about how that reflects on me. Within reason, of course.)

Oh boy! Was that a gem. And on to my next piece of black mail. Umm...yeah. I hope I never find any of this used to black mail me. Just sayin'.

So for this one, the photo itself isn't too embarrassing. I'm wearing clothes that I still wear today. (No. Not the actual clothing. Just the type of clothing: jean shorts and t-shirts. I don't think that will ever go "out of style". Not that it's really a style. It's just good ol' comfy clothes. 'Nough said.)  However, the early 1900s called and they want my glasses back. (I'm not kidding. Check out this page on eyeglass history.) I mean, really?! I still to this day don't know what I was thinking. I will give myself this margin of error: it is RIDICULOUSLY hard to find good looking glasses for my tiny face. Seriously. You, again, can ask my mom who has been with me many times. I'm pretty sure we go through about 50+ pairs every. single. time.  Here's a little story on how difficult it is for me to find adult glasses that fit my face: Just a little over a year ago I was looking for new glasses. The girl working was really sweet and trying to pull different frames for me that she thought would work. This one pair of kid sized frames fit my face really well but, boy, did I look like I was in high school. I quickly pulled them off. She asked me what I didn't like about them and I told her. She asked me how old I was. When I told her I was 25, she stared at me and apologized. She thought I was 18 and told me they were kids frames. Yeah. It ain't easy finding a good pair of glasses for me that don't make me look 16. I'm not complaining that I look young. I just don't need help in that department. I already get glares like I'm too young to have Zoë. Ha! Sorry this one is fuzzy. I had to crop it so you could really see what I'm talking about for this one. The picture itself looks normal to most people. However, to me, it's embarrassing because I know that I'm not really smiling. I couldn't stand that gap between my teeth. I know it doesn't bother many people (I'm talking those who have a gap); I'm also well aware that many people never noticed mine, even if I was showing it. My parents paid a pretty penny to change my smile; they paid a pretty penny for me to feel comfortable truly smiling. The picture before this was a rare one in that you can see the gap I always covered when I smiled. Maybe not too awkward to some, but I find it a little strange that I worried about my smile. I am glad that I have the smile that I do now though :) That about wraps up my post. I sifted through the pics I have and these were really the only ones I had stuff I could talk about. I know there are more, but they are all four hours away from my in a cabinet at my mom's house. Hope you enjoyed these gems! And click the button if you want to see other's posts they linked too!

Twitter Provoked Thoughts

Linking up with Amy from Taking Steps Home for Frankly Friday. :) (And if you don't know who she is, you should check her blog out. I love reading her posts. She's so honest! Maybe that's why she started this little linky party ;])



"Whatever your job may be, when you're a Christian you ultimately work for Jesus as an act of worship and a witness to others." - Mark Driscoll (@PastorMark)

"If you're waiting for your sin nature to surrender, you're dreaming. It's a fight till death." - Louie Giglio (@louiegiglio)

These are two tweets that came across my scroll (I don't know what to call it. And I like the sound of that. Ok? Sounds good to me.) the other day.

Both left me thinking.

Thinking about how I sit around thinking about all I wish I was as a follower of Christ. But doing nothing about it.

Of course, this goes more with the fact that I idolize those who are "in the ministry". You know: pastors and worship leaders and christian writers. Those who I feel, at least outwardly, live daily working a job that is for Jesus. Not that they aren't living it inwardly, but the truth is, many of them I don't know from Adam. So I really don't know if the inside meets road with the outside. Oh, and I often don't know what their actual daily life looks like.

I've idolized those people who must be living for Jesus because their job says they have to. (Oi! Are my thoughts full of fallacy or what? Good ol' lies straight from the pit.)

My job certainly doesn't seem to fit the bill. (That is by worldly standards.)

Clean the house. Change diapers. Make sure food is there and ready and/or accessible for all meals. Read Good Dog, Carl by Alexandra Day 100 times. Change diapers. Stack and push over blocks 2,300 times. Run errands. Play with Little People. Put the toddler down for a nap. Redirect a curious toddler 2,324,304 times a day. Read Barnyard Dance by Sandra Boynton 230.5 times. Change diapers. Put the toddler down for a nap. Clean dishes. Play with the light switch for however long it entertains. Watch Praise Baby. Crawl on all fours. Change diapers. Discover the taste of a magnet. (Do we remember this subconciously? Is that why we don't put the magnet in our mouth when we could remember how it tastes?) Wash laundry. (Did I mention change diapers?) Listen to my husband who is eager to tell me about his day. Put the toddler down for the night. Wrap up whatever it is I didn't get to before then. Hit the sack.

And it repeats itself with slight variations on a daily basis. (You know, throw in a bible study, play date, library time, zoo trip, whatever it may be.) (Oh. And please do not read into how I wrote that list. I am not mumbling it off like I hate reading to my daughter or listening to my husband and begrudge that I have to do those things on a daily basis. Yes. I am human. I have my bad days where I want the world to revolve around me, but generally, I am very happy that I get to do most of that on a daily basis. And the parts that I haven't learned to love, well...I'm praying I will.)

I find my mind bogged down believing that there is nothing holy about this mothering/home keeper job. That certainly this isn't a higher calling on my life from the Creator of the Universe.

But it is. Because it is here in this time and place that He has directly placed me. It is here in this time and place that He brought me and my husband to believe it is the best, most God-glorifying act for our family to have a sole provider and a sole home manager and day-time child caretaker.

This is no mistake.

It is as He planned.

Which is probably why I battle those horrible lies:

You are not enough.

She is not getting the best mothering that she could.

You could do a better job of ______________. (Yes, that truly is a has-a-million-different-answers fill-in-the-blank.)

If only you would do _____________, then your home would be truly cared for. (Another multi-faceted fill-in-the-blank.)

You didnt do _______________ and your husband noticed. You let him down. Big. (And another. I think I'm seeing a pattern here...just maybe.)

There are a million different lies on a million different days that I am sure have flashed across my mind. That, like Louie Giglio stated so well, I will be battling until death.

And I can only believe that it is because this job that I don't always treat as the higher calling it is truly is a higher calling.

This idol I've made of "ministry" jobs, those jobs that just happen to be called so by our world, must die. I cannot serve God the way I should if I'm believing this isn't as great as those jobs. I will only sit around thinking of what He asks of me rather than doing what it is He's called me to here and now.

Which can include diaper changing. Did you know that?

What is it He has called you to? Do you fully embrace that it is your calling? Or do you find yourself believing the lies so easily slipped in by the Enemy?

Why, yes! I'm not dead!

So I know I'm hailing from the land of #icanbarelyhearathing and #haventtrulypostedinwhoknowshowlong, but I'm still going to keep it simple. Because, well, this mind has pretty much stayed as simple as it can over the past few weeks. Between just enjoying my time at my sisters (yes, I'm well aware I've still to post on that...and with my memory as of late, it just might not happen), getting sick, going to my lil sis' wedding (WHAT?! So surreal you guys!), and Zoë getting pink eye all while I'm still fighting off the remnants of my illness (Thank you for the double ear infection and ruptured ear drums. I was asking to constantly say "Huh?! I can't hear you. Speak up! Talk in this ear!" Yep.That's what I was hoping for.)...well, I think you get the point. Ha! So on to #5QF.

1. Who drives when your family is together: you or your spouse?

Usually Ben drives and I sit in the passenger seat. I do enjoy driving at times and I'm no fan of the back seat as I get car sick quite easily, but if he's around, he generally wants to drive. So I let him :)

2. Are you an introvert or extrovert?

Introvert. Hands down. And being a mom/wife has only helped me revert into myself a little more. It's not that I don't like people. Honest. It's just I'm rarely comfortable around anyone I don't know and I hate, hate, hate large groups. Like "I have clautrophobia" hate large groups. (Yes. I really am clautrophobic, but thankfully I do try to conquer my fear so it doesn't completely hold me back. I just might have panic attack if put too outside my element. Ha!)

Peace?

Quiet?

Only me?

Please and thank you!

Though, I do enjoy time with my friends and I can really get into being in the same room as someone I really care about or am close to but not saying much. Just doing your own thing in the same space.

Yep. Introvert.

3. Are you married to an introvert or extrovert?

Extrovert. Completely loves to be with people. I have to tell him at least an hour before I'm ready to go that I am. Because it will take no less (no, I'm not joking) than one hour to get him out of wherever we are. He doesn't know a stranger.

We used to get in fights daily, now just a couple times a week (it's getting better...s...l...o...w...l...y) about how he was "on top of me". While I was brushing my teeth. Cleaning dishes. Getting ready for bed. Making dinner. You name it. He was following me. Literally.

Yes, I married an extrovert. And we are so very much polar opposites.

4. What's your favorite type of social media?

Twitter.

Hands down.

It's to the point. It can keep me connected with the news world, which I'm a fan of because I generally forget to turn the news on and can only handle all the broken stories in small bits.

Now if I only had a smart phone... (ha!)

5. What's your favorite way to "recharge"?

It just depends, really.

Some days I just want to take a quick nap.

Others I love to sit with a good book somewhere where I can't be bothered. (Which obviously can't be done at home anymore. I lament this fact.)

And then on the days that I do want to get out of the home, I love finding my own corner of a coffee shop (see, I do like people, just to do my own thing.) and setting up with my computer, some good music and do whatever my heart desires. Whether it be reading, surfing the web, playing an online game (Candy Crush Saga, anyone?), or just listening to music alone.

However, I should make the point that to "recharge" I have to be alone. Not interacting at all with someone I know. And I need at least an hour.

I joke that I could be a hermit. And honestly, if it weren't for feeling called to be a wife and mom, I'm pretty sure I would have found a way to slightly give myself that pleasure. Because I could give my all, all day long, to others and then just recluse myself for several hours in the evening. And that would be just fine with me. On my bad days, I wish I was a hermit. But then I remember that I have the greatest blessing and refining tools with me on a daily basis.

Why would I give them up? I can't imagine life without them.

And after all, even hermit-loving people like me know life was meant to be shared not isolated.

Yeah, I got a little serious. But I figure I'm just sharing bits of me :)

Happy Friday everyone! (Oooy...one day that will mean my husband actually has a weekend....one day...)