Against All Odds

I promised I would start filling you guys in on our story. I started last week with some tidbits on my past. That pretty much catches you up to April/May of 2008. So that's where I'll start...

During this time in my life, I was doing a lot of emotional healing from having dated a guy for 2 1/2 years and the aftermath of a very unhealthy, but graciously short relationship. I happened to be building a really good relationship with one of my close guy friends and God was slowly bringing me back into a relationship with Him. (I must note that the slow part really had to do everything to do with me and my hurts and hesitation. God was being patient. Very patient.)

From the time my dad found out about his job transfer, my mom shamelessly begged me to move down to Baton Rouge. She would find any way she could to talk to me about searching for a job down there. I, however, was adament: I'm NOT moving to Baton Rouge. I wouldn't even turn my head in that direction to start looking for a job there.

During that Spring semester, guy #3 and I had become really good friends. I also thought I had found a job that would work out, if only I could land it. I thought things were looking up for me.

Guy #3 and I eventually started dating. When in the semester, I'm not really sure, but I know that we did. I do remember he was really sweet in the way he asked if he could pursue me. I really thought everything was going well and God was showing me I was right about staying in Little Rock. (Sometimes, I still wish I lived up there. I still want to move back to Arkansas. It's just so pretty up there! Trust me. I shamelessly ask Ben if he can move his job up there. :)

And then the job fell through. As in, I never got a call back. Not even the decency to say they'd chosen someone else.

*wah wah wah*

I was bummed. Severely.

By the point I knew I wasn't getting the job, I hadn't heard from anyone else. I couldn't find a job that would sustain me, let alone, bring in a small amount of income. I'm pretty sure I cried. I still had no desire to move to Baton Rouge.

Somewhere in May, during the middle of not hearing back and not finding anything else, I remember having a quiet time. I was frankly asking God what I was supposed to do and why on earth I wasn't finding anything in Little Rock. Why would You not provide something for me up here?! (Hmm...how nice of me to pin it to Him. The blame game. It works so well.)

It was in that time I will never forget Him whispering to my spirit these words:

"If you want to be in the center of my will, you will move to Baton Rouge."

WHAT?! You can't be serious. Please, please don't be serious.


Oh. my. goodness. You're serious. But how on earth am I going to find a job there if I can't even find one where I live?

Trust me.


Do you trust me?

...ok...I tru...ugh....I trust you. Your plans are best.

Within a weeks time, I had a temporary plan, had the possibility of a room mate, and a job that would let me live my dream for the Summer: working with horses. (You guys, I constantly tell Ben that if we ever have the money, I want one. I love horses. And yes, I've been thrown from one we were trying to re-saddle train. I love horses.) During that time, I would be able to try to find something more stable as well as pay a little better.

Time flew once I moved down there. Within a few short weeks, I was living with a girl who owned her home, I had a job that allowed for me to move up and paid well enough for me to live off of, and I was involved in a church. I was even starting to make friends. (Oh. By the way, I ended it with Guy #3, though he begged me to do long distance. I was not up for that as I hadn't had a great experience with it for 2 1/2 years. We both cried at the realization, but I also knew that it was for the best.)

As the months passed, I remember having several conversations with my mom about dating and the next guy. In so many words I told her I was fine if I was single for the rest of my life, though I still dreamed of getting married some day. (Umm...marriage is great, but why do we dream about the hardest aspects of life? As a kid we dream about becoming an adult, unaware of all the responsibility. We also dream about marriage with no realization that it is tough, hard work. Worth it? Most definitely, but it was nothing what I dreamed of as a kid.) I had honestly began dreaming about going back to school to get my BSN, RN. I dreamed about being a traveling nurse and maybe going to help in countries that would otherwise not have it. I truly was content with where I was in life and not in need of a guy. I kind of didn't want one.

Not too long after I had that conversation, I met Ben. He was friends with several of the people I was getting to know and he was involved in the collegiate ministry at our church. (No. I wasn't in college, but those were the people closest in age to me.) And I'm pretty sure around the 2nd or 3rd time I saw him (I'm talking we might have said "hi" to each other. And no, I wasn't all out attracted. He was cute, but my mind wasn't playing wedding bells), my spirit was moved. I heard God foreshadowing my future if Ben and I both stayed commited to our relationships with Christ.

So against all odds, I had gone from Little Rock to Baton Rouge. I had begun making friends with the group Ben hung out with. And God was giving me glimpses of a possible future for me. Needless to say, I was a bit in shock. And wondering how on earth that would work out considering I hardly knew the guy. Yet, I knew that I had questioned God before and He had proven Himself trustworthy.

I was slightly perturbed by this possible truth as I was just becoming comfortable with and LOVING single life. But I did what I knew God wanted me to do: waited. Waited to see how the story would unfold.

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