Quick Update & 5QF

So here is to an easy post. I don't want to spend a ton of time telling about what's going on now...I just don't :) I'd rather cherish it in my mind.

SO...

I do have to say my little sweet pea is growing too fast. Ben came and pulled me out of the bedroom this morning saying, "Mom, you might wanna come see this."

I asked, "What? She rolled over?"

No. She didn't roll over. She had used her very strong, long legs to almost push herself off her play gym. Tummy time turned into working to scoot herself forward. This cannot be happening. Seriously?! I know we're still a ways away from true scooting to get where she wants but...SERIOUSLY?! Ugh...they grow so fast!

What does melt my momma heart is we are full blown smiling :) A lot! And I have had her smile back at me several times. Dad has even been the receiver of it. Precious! Haven't captured it with a phone camera or real camera yet, though I've tried. But soon. Oh very soon I hope.

Anyway...

Here is 5QF:

1. What advice would you give a couple getting married?Hmmm...well lets see, considering I've only been married a year and a half, I still feel extremely new to this. Technically, I think we are still considered newly weds (I think they say that about married couples until they're what...2 years married?...something like that). Even if that's not right, I still feel new at this and I have a 2 month old to reckon with that newness.
So...
Communication takes work. Lots of work. You will find what you say may not mean exactly what you wanted it to. Sometimes because your tone of voice and/or body language is off. Sometimes because your spouse doesn't communicate like you (there's a shocker!) so he/she didn't take it how you meant it. However, if you take time and put forth effort it is so unbelievably worth it to work hard at it. 
Ask questions to make sure you understood properly. WAIT to work out a fight if you need to take a breather so you don't say something you regret later. Don't assume he/she knows what you mean by a particular phrase. When they ask you what you want, tell them because more than likely they can't guess by clues you give them (maybe girls do this way more than guys, so I might be speaking to the female side of things, but I know my husband has done this a time or two).
WORK, WORK, WORK, WORK, and did I say WORK at it! 'Til death parts you it will take work. BUT - You will not regret it!
2. If you could tell your 16-year-old self ONE thing, what would it be?Well, considering I have always struggled with postitive self-image (both physical and thinking I was not worth anyone's time) and back then it manifested itself in hiding my true self, I would probably tell myself this:Be real. Hiding is hard work. It is not worth it. God designed you just as you are. He desires to know you. The real you. He wants you to share that with others, too. Don't worry about how other's will respond to that. Some will be drawn to it, others will not. But what truly matters is allowing God in, to build a relationship with Him that will pour over into other's lives. You are worth time because you have something to share with the world:Matthew 5:14-16 (NASB) "You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden; nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven."
3. What do you do to keep yourself cool in the summer? (AC, windows, fans, swimming, etc.)I would have to say AC. Or if it provides enough shade and cool breeze, a tree in a park. I may get into a pool if one is handy (no membership to anywhere - though I'm not a big fan of public pools, don't know someone who has one) 
4. What did you (or your wife) crave most while pregnant?Considering I just finished that time in my life, and boy do I wish I could skip that entire experience if we have another child, this is an easy answer. Because I only had one craving: Avacados. I still love them. I could eat one, no three, a day and still possibly not tire of them. 
5. Who is your favorite TV mom? Why?Well, considering we actually don't have cable or even the basic channels (not able to get HD signal...believe me we've tried), I'm not up-to-date on who's out there right now. And honestly, before that I stuck to mostly Everybody Loves Raymond. Hilarious show. Not something to be modeled at all, but I think that's kind of the point. It rides on the stupid things no one should do when married, but not sure I could say Deborah is my favorite TV mom...so...can I cop out and say I don't have one? I guess I'm gonna have to.

Count Your Blessings

So I had every intention of beginning this post with a picture of the plaque hanging above my kitchen sink. The title of this post is exactly what it reads. And it has been a great reminder of how in these long weeks of feeling inadequate, crazy enough to be admitted, angry enough you understand just how fleshly you are and are able to relate to those parents you see on the news, blessings still abound underneath it all.

Zoë may scream until daylight is gone. She may need way more TLC than most babies. She may scream at me angrily when it doesn't go her way (yes, I believe a baby this age is fully capable of having wants and trying to demand them).

My flesh may not want to be responsible 24/7 for a child solely because I want me time without interruption. My anger may start to boil in response to her anger or my inability to console her. Fatigue may overcome me.

And yet if I don't take the time to count my blessings, I get lost in the negative, never to gain back all the blessings I could have been cherishing. Just to name a few:

• As for now, Zoë has no health issues - every well-check we have been told she is 100% healthy. For that matter, our entire little family is healthy!
• Ben works his tail end off to ensure we are cared for
• My amazing husband also desires for me to stay home with our children so he works 2 jobs just to pull that off (oh are we ever praying God will provide one job to do the trick!)

Those are the three "biggest" blessings in my life right now. There are too many to count aside from that and I didn't think anyone would really want to read them so I count over them at different times of the day. Doing so brings me back to the reality this phase in Zoë life that seems to make my hair stand on end will be short lived. As long as I can spend time throughout the day, especially in the hard moments, reminding myself there are way more blessings and each difficulty will bring about good if I allow it that is a good day.

It's helping me to learn that a "good day" can't be based off of how crummy it may seem. Am I breathing? Am I healthy? Can the same be said of Ben and Zoë? Are our needs met? If I can answer those questions with a yes, then it was a good day. Now you will still probably hear me say it was a good or a bad day. Old habits die hard and that's not one I'm really feeling the need to kick, especially with out culture and the way we communicate. But what I am aiming for is trying to remind myself that good on my terms isn't necessarily good on God's and aiming to see life through His eyes.

Sorry for the rambling. That has been on my chest and needed to put it in writing.

Moby Wrap to Save the DAY!

Oh Moby!

How I have fallen for you! I do believe we have begun a long term relationship. If you continue to step up how you did this morning, we just might save my sanity and bring it back home. You will also make a treasure out of what once was my precious baby's hours of lost naptime.

And dear friend, you will get a rest as well, for my little love bug is trained well in night time sleep. You will see few dawns as God has graciously aided her in learning there is no wake time between her dream feed and 6 A.M.

In only a few hours time I noted you gave me back my hands, Zoë her sleep, and peace of mind for us all! I pray this was no tease.

Your Newest Admirer,

Zoë's Mommy

Talking to My Duck Friend

So we're borrowing my sister's play gym, which has a few small stuffed animals hanging from it. Zoë, for whatever reason, is most enamored with the duck. If she's gonna pipe up a convo, it will be with the duck.  Thought I'd share one of the glimpses of happy moments we get around these parts. They're what I focus on when I feel like I'm going under. Definitely cherished!

Before you watch it, know she takes her time and this is at the tail end of it...I kind of missed the more babbly part of her session :/ And she does get fussy at the end :)

This is My Life

A picture is worth 1000 words...

...and these are nothing pretty!

But even the faces in these two pictures don't sum up colic or how Ben and I feel right now. I hate how fast Zoë is growing up and yet I can't wait for some of the months to pass so I can slightly retrieve my sanity and she can enjoy life around her without fussing so much.

I've tried changing the diet. And putting her next to a dryer. And car rides. And going out on a walk. And you name it we've probably tried it.

Car rides work at times but who has money to spend on the gas to aimlessly drive around until their infant falls asleep? Not me!

Nothing works better than holding her. It still is crazy hard at times considering she still may scream in your face for several minutes. Talk about frustrating. 

I am currently awaiting my Moby Wrap to arrive. It will hopefully allow me to have both hands free so I can contiue with house hold work and console my daughter at the same time. I hope this thing works because it is definitely a last resort for a momma who was hoping to teach her daughter to console herself to sleep every time she goes down but can't because the little bean has colic :/