We Made it Through (and a bunch of rambling)

Hurricane Isaac, which turned into a Tropical Storm while hovering over Baton Rouge, has come and gone.

We found out electricity was lost at our apartment and lost a majority of what was inside our fridge.

However, God was gracious in that, though we were without T.V. (not such a huge ordeal to me considering we don't have cable or even basic channels at home) and internet for almost 24 hours, electricity continued to flow through the storms entirety over at my parent's house. This means I never had to go without all the modern marvels of A/C, a breast pump, and lights. I didn't have to brave the lovely humidity with an already teething, cranky five month old. None of my family suffered any damage and everyone is ok.

There were some moments where we feared for a family members dad, who lives in an area that was majorly flooded, but God answered prayers. He was found and is safe. 

Part of me is hating the fact the internet is back up.

You know, I'm coming to learn I have a love-hate relationship with most of modernity.

I'm also realizing (honestly I continue to realize this a lot but I'm just reminisicing again) how if it weren't for the wonderful mother God gave me, I would be a hermit. Maybe that's partly why I am in a love-hate relationship with the times.

My heart screams for absence from people, internet, phones (oh how I HATE [did you catch that?] talking on the phone, yet love having it for those times I absolutely need it), etc.

I love my car, A/C, lights (only those that cast a soft, small light), and the fact that I don't have to make my own clothes :)

Oh so back to my wonderful mom: you see, if it weren't for her, I would have forever ago found a way to give in to what my heart screams for most. But she, being the wonderful mother that she was and is, took a lot of time to sit with me to talk and work through my hates. She also did not give into my hate of the phone and complete lack of interest in building relationships.

I will never forget the time (I was thirteen you guys...keep that in mind while reading this) she forced me to make a phone call for a science project. I was homeschooled so I didn't have a "turn it in or you'll get an F" looming over me (HA! So I thought). It sat around without me doing it for at least a week.

She continued to inquire: "Did you make that call?"

I skirted the question however I could.

She wasn't blind. She knew I was avoiding it.

And finally the hatchet was raised, poised in ready to be lowered: "Megan, you're going to do this or you will get an 'F' on this project and I will assign a similar project with extra work."

Wha wha wha.

"Excuse me?!?!"I thought. "You did not just tell me I would get an 'F'. Oh I DO NOT want to make that phone call. UGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"

Of course, my perfectionist self, knowing full well that I was capable of 100%, made the call. I passed the project.

And I learned that making a phone call isn't as horrible as I make it out to be. By no means did it make a phone talker out of me, but I can now make a call, ask for what I need, and do it for myself (yes, I just patted myself on the back...I'm still proud of myself for doing ANYTHING like that for myself) :)

She also made me make the call when I wanted to get a friend over (yes, I don't hate people. I just don't draw energy from being with people and need plenty of me time after spending time with someone no matter how much I love them). So I learned to build relationships without someone else to buffer for me.

Maybe none of this is coming out right. That's ok with me. I'm just rambling about what's on my heart. And what is on my heart is how grateful I am for a wonderful mom who nurtured me the best way she knew how and helped me to not hide myself from society.

Thanks mom for taking the time to work with this hard headed, quietly willful child of yours! You're the best :)

Absenteeism can only get worse...

...from the blog that is.

You see, I can't even begin to tell you what happened last week. I know it was slammed full with almost every day having something going on. But I honestly don't remember half of it.

And now, I'm awaiting what is slowly working it's way into a hurricane: Isaac.

I'm not really all hyped up into weather-gone-bad.

I'm not naive by a long shot either.

I'm prepared. Have the necessities should electricity be out for days. But it is what it is and I will roll with the punches once it gets here.

Aside from that, I'm pretty much pouring time into reading attempting to read while helping my little diva work on all her "do-it-myself" skills (i.e. rolling around, sitting up, reaching and grabbing...you know - all the things we take for granted). Or sleeping closing my eyes only to get up because nap time is over by the time I can even lie down. *sigh*

I have several posts I want to write. I just haven't made time for it and have been too exhausted to get to it.

So please pardon me, but I'm may just use this tropical storm predicted-to-turn-hurricane Isaac as more of an excuse to stay away. Who knows...it may actually take electricity from me by Wednesday anyway. And then there is no telling how long it will be before I am back to modern inventions better than the flashlight.

Memory Monday v. 11

I want to cherish for a lifetime...

...your baby-soft hand reaching out to touch my cheek, accompanied by the sweetest look in your eye as though you're saying, "I love you, Mommy."

Zoë, oh Zoë!

MELT. YOUR. MOMMY'S. HEART. without fail every time.

Many times I find myself wishing I could freeze us in the time-space continuum just to be able to bask in that moment for a few hours, or days. Ok, maybe even a year or longer :)

It is pure sweetness flowing out of you and makes me feel so blessed to be your mommy! I wouldn't trade it for the world, but those moments...*sweet sigh*...they're like a small glimpse of Heaven.

I must say you are without a doubt the best surprise I have ever received. I am so glad God gave you to us, precious girl.

Love,

Mommy

I Made It...

...to Friday, that is.

My little sweet pea has been dealing with teething ALL. WEEK. LONG.

You see, last week she

OMG! She just rolled from her back to her tummy for the first time! YAY ZOË! I unfortunately scared her because she startles and wasn't expecting my big, loud (oops! The French and Italian in me came out :]) encouragement. Ha ha! I'm beyond excited for her. YAY!

Anyway, last week she finished cutting her first tooth. That was...fun? Poor baby has zero pain tolerance it seems so she was held a lot to console her and help her work through it. Near the end of last week, the tooth finally finished popping all of its top out. We were then just waiting for the whole tooth to emerge, which should be minimal discomfort as there wasn't any cutting through gums involved.

However, to my dismay (and I'm sure Zoë's as well), she started cutting the tooth next to the first one earlier this week. It wasn't near as bad as the first tooth, but she still is no "Pain? What's that?" type of person.

I didn't expect her to be. I just didn't expect tooth #2 to start cutting this week.

My sanity feels like it has left me, but I'm here. In one piece. With a content (when the tooth isn't bothering her) baby girl, who has almost finished cutting tooth #2.

I kind of can't believe I'm typing that. My five month old has almost cut two teeth. That is nuts.

Yesterday was just as crazy as today. However, I was able to meet my first blog friend: Melissa.

I feel like I look like a college kid in this pic with my back pack on. HA!

Even though we only had a little bit of time, it was so great to meet her. It was so easy to talk with her and I thoroughly enjoyed the time we had together. Love her laugh! Made me laugh every. time. Seriously, Mel, you have an awesome laugh!

Anywho, after a long week this southern girl needs some fried food. I think that might be my next biggest habit I want to kick before Zoë can realized what I'm doing. I really don't want to teach her to eat based off of emotions at all. The first habit would be my mouth :( Yes, when I get fired up, the curse words can fly at times. Ugh!

Grateful for God's grace as I look to him to help change the parts of me that need it.

Here's to a wonderful weekend!

5 Months Old

Geez, time is F.L.Y.I.N.G!

Between a busy schedule, which I'm enjoying as it means I'm not so isolated (quite weird for the introvert, enjoy-my-corner type person I am) anymore, and consoling a teething baby, blogging just hasn't been up there on my to dos. It should be. My thoughts are running rampant. However, I find making baby food, spending time with my little Sweet Pea, and engaging in life keeping me away from the computer. However, I had to make sure to capture this before I forget.

Anyway...

5 MONTHS!

Just yesterday I was looking at the faces of the four people with me as sweet Zoë cried for the first time: my OB was holding her up with the biggest smile on his face, Ben stared in awe at the tiny human he helped create, my mom cried at the sight of her first granddaughter, and my sister helped in on the crying with the biggest, happy smile on her face. Yesterday I remember hearing the doctor say "It's a girl!" as I looked at the ridiculously long, precious baby I had nurtured for almost 40 weeks, had shared every part of my life with, though she would tell you it was quite cozy and not remember the not so comfortable moments :) Only yesterday I nestled 7 pounds 10.1 ounces and 21 inches into the crook of a single arm, while I looked on her perfect, tiny features.

Yesterday.

Well, it feels that way, but the hard facts tell me otherwise.

Though I have no idea how much she actually weighs, my guess is she's hovering in the 16 pound area. And she's grown at least a 1/2 inch, possibly more. There is no way, in God's green earth, I can hold her in the crook of just one arm anymore.

5 Month Stats

• You are in size 3 diapers.
• Still wearing size 3-6 mo/6 mo clothes, though a lot of the 3-6 mo is becoming too small and the 6 mo fits almost perfectly. I'm sure by next month none of these will fit you.
• You eat every 3 hours and you are now almost to a consistent schedule for feedings, though every now and then you eat earlier or later.
• You officially started solids about 1.5 weeks ago. You recently decided you are not a big fan of rice cereal, but as we introduced green beans recently, we're waiting to try baby oatmeal. Either way, you like green beans :)
• I still don't consider you a great napper, though many informative sites I've read say you're taking naps the way most babies your age do. By the end of the day, you usually total somewhere around 3 hours of naps so I can't complain
• You are an extremely happy baby. You may fuss more than some babies, but usually it's because you know what you want and it's the only way you know to communicate. This won't be so fun when you're pitching a fit trying to get your own way, but I am so glad you will be able to voice likes, dislikes, wants, desires, etc.
• You have decided sleeping on your tummy is a no go. You still don't roll from back to tummy as you prefer to not be on your tummy, though I have been able to get some good tummy time out of you the past few days ("good" tummy time means I you play while on your tummy for maybe 5 minutes).
• You can keep your head in line with your body when you're pulled up to a sitting or standing position from lying down. I can rarely get you to go from lying down to sitting anymore, though. You prefer to go straight to your feet. I'm beginning to think you will learn to walk early.
• You laugh a lot. I love your little giggle. So, so sweet! I will say you humor some very random things, probably more a testament to the fact you're happy.
• Gigi and I made you a lovey so we could have a backup when one gets dirty :) You love it! If I forget to grab it for you when we're cuddling before your nap or bedtime, you cry.

I can't think of anything else. I probably forgot something, but it's just not at the forefront of my thoughts. I'm sure it will come up some time if it's important. Anyway, here a few pictures from this past month and our monthly "growing" picture.

Though this picture may not show it very well, you are getting quite long. Growing so fast :(

Though the lighting stinks, this was the best shot I could get of you on your 5 month birthday.

This was after a nap. You had rolled over. It was around the time this picture was taken I realized naps on your tummy would be a no go as you would roll over and wake yourself up :/

Oh are you into EVERYTHING! I already know I will have to watch out once you can maneuver yourself around. See, we had gone in the bathroom so you could look in the mirrior. However, that lasted all of a second when the counter top caught your eye. You bent over and stared at it for minutes. Oh little Toot Toot. You make me laugh!

Had to capture a pic of my little Jedi. Daddy always calls you...well one of the Star Wars Jedi people when you have this particular towel on. I obviously can't remember which one right now.

I absolutely love how much you play with your hands. Not to mention how daintily you hold them. You are ALL. GIRL.

You love mommy's water bottle. I used to think it was only because it's red, but now I think it just interests you. Even the top alone will capture your attention.

Eating some of your first rice cereal. You may try to hold the spoon early...

Your face after your first solid food. Love the expression on your face :)

Daddy was all into making sure I got a good picture of how messy your face was. He wants to make sure we capture all those moments :)

This is often how we find you after you're asleep. If the blanket isn't in your hands, we often find it over your face. I have learned I can do absolutely nothing about this as both Daddy and I have pulled it off your face, only to come back in the room and find it BACK ON your face. 

Sweet Girl,

You are just that: sweet (well, you're not just sweet, but you know what I mean). I get so many compliments on how you are such a "well behaved baby". Unfortunately, I don't think I can take too much credit for it. It is in your nature; you were that way in the womb.

It honestly makes it harder to watch you hurt, like with teething, and gets my blood boiling that much more easily when you start pitching a fit. And yes, though you are young, you know how to pitch a fit. I'm not quite looking forward to disciplining you in that area. Thankfully, as long as I look to him, God will help me to work with you in a supernatural way.

I love how much you laugh these days. You find some of the strangest situations or actions funny, but it makes my heart burst at the seams.

Oh and the light in your eyes when you smile. Your fiercely blue eyes. Daddy already talks about how he needs to purchase a shot gun.

You are so full of life, something I am sure will make raising you that much more difficult, but also that much more rewarding to see you blossom into who you are created to be.

I love you fiercely sweet girl. You are my pride and joy!

Love,

Mommy

Wetting Her Toes

We started solids this past weekend.

This mom is happy to say Zoë is taking it on like Donkey Kong :)

I'm not sure if the video we captured of her first meal will show how she dives for the spoon. I honestly haven't had the time to watch or upload it yet. I do know that I love watching her because she will open her mouth ready for it and if I'm not fast enough she bends over straight for the spoon. She's even tried to take the spoon from me, though I know she's no where near ready to feed herself, let alone with a utensil. This diving action is countered, however, by the big breaks between bites she takes. She enjoys her food, taking her time between bites. Though it's currently only rice cereal, I'm planning on introducing her first veggie next week.

She is all into discovering her surroundings. As I type, she is on the floor reaching and half way rolling from back to tummy for a floor mirror (the bottom of it at that, seeing as she tipped it over earlier) that has suddenly captured her interest. Maybe we'll be in the neighborhood of rolling around soon. I say all this to remind myself later of one of the reasons she doesn't just go in for the next bite. Obviously, food isn't the first thing on her mind. At least, rice cereal isn't.

It's making this mom stop to smell the roses a bit more, all while trying to enjoy the phase she's in even though I want to pull my hair out at times with the crying brought on by the tooth she's cutting. Grateful for the multitude of ways God reminds me that I have one of the greatest blessings as my "job" (I truly don't think of it as a job).

Memory Monday v. 10

I want to cherish for a lifetime...

...the way my hubby helps out as much as possible around the home.

He cleans the kitchen after I cook without me asking. He is fully involved in caring for our daughter, including changing those wonderful blow outs I've heard many men use as a pass off to mom. He helps with breakfast so we can hopefully eat it together at least one morning out of his work week.

Yep.

I sure hope I tell him enough I appreciate him, because he honestly is the best. :)

Something I'm *Re*Pondering

"Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. But if any of you lacks widsom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind." James 1: 2-6 (NASB)

*sigh*

These words hit home right now. If I'm recalling correctly, my last few posts have been pretty "Debbie Downer". Life is rough right now. And I'm unfortunately focusing on those rough patches rather than leaving my eyes fixed on the Author and Perfector of my faith.

Consider it all joy when a trial is part of your story.

Because I'm into looking up definitions lately, solely so I can have the exact meaning in my mind, here is how Webster defines the word "all": "wholly, entirely." "Wholly" is defined as "to the whole amount or extent; totally; entirely." Since both entirely was part of the definitions of both "all" and "wholly", I looked up that definition too (are you gathering I'm a bit of a nerd when it comes to reading, at times?): "not lacking any parts; whole; complete; intact."

"...all joy, when you encounter various trials." Not part of. Not bits and pieces. Not "I will consider that joy but not this." ALL. The. whole. trial.

My current trial is feeling like I have to battle with my 4 month old to help console her.

Listen to me! Battle with a 4 month old?!

I'm crazy you guys. I take full responsibility for my actions. I will say that part of it is crying puts me on. the. E.D.G.E.

Seriously.

If crying finds its point of no return, my body kicks into full I-need-all-the-chocolate-within-a-20-mile-radius mode.

No lie.

Yet, I do not find myself looking at this phase in my life, which is a full on trial when it comes to testing me and God seeking to mold me into His likeness, as "all joy".

Part of it is a complete dying to self, which I am not always jumping for joy ready to do. I wonder why? *cough* selfish nature *cough* (Sorry. I'm sarcastic.)

Part of it is I did not expect to have a baby who was this vocal. She is laid back. I expected that. But what I didn't expect is that she would be vocal too. It is possible to be laid back but know what you want. Really. I can be like that at times. However, I thought she would be more like her dad who frequently says he doesn't know what he wants, in effort to have everyone get along, and is extremely laid back.

Nope.

She fished and caught from my gene pool on that one.

The bad thing about expectations is it's hard to let them go when they aren't met. And in this one, I must let them go.

If I don't, I will not be able to enjoy my child. I will not find joy in this trial.

I'm thinking a lot about this. This post may be a bit jumbled. But I don't have time to finish it: my little one is getting hungry :)

Just thought I would share where I am in thinking about where I am.

What trial are you facing that you aren't considering all joy?