Praying for Him: His Relationships

If there is one area I have truly spent time praying for my husband, it is in the area of relationships: that he would be surrounded by godly men and seek out relationships with godly men.

I don't say this to pat myself on the back or toot my own horn.

Honestly, I say this because I know the importance of relationships. Period. Which, coming from someone who frequently wishes she would have listened to her hermit-like inner-voice, is saying a lot, in my opinion. (Though you can take it all worth a grain of salt if you'd like considering I just promoted my opinion there. It was on accident, however. I digress.)

How do I know the importance of them? Because I have lived where I really didn't have any friends and then I have been blessed with friendships that I'm pretty sure I will have until the day I die. The latter is extremely rare as well as lots and LOTS of HARD WORK! I'm not saying the hard work is bad, but it most definitely takes putting myself aside, trudging the nasty waters of conflict, and learning to accept all of a person. (And YES, my friends have to do the same for me for it to work. Not saying I'm an easy person to get along with. In fact, I know I'm not an easy person to get along with.)

Choosing friends who will build you up is important. And it's imporant for your spouse, too.

Thankfully, I saw a quick answer to my prayer asking for great relationships when we moved to Houston. I knew that friendships can take a lot of time, even for someone who is as outgoing, sociable, people-oriented as Ben. (The guy doesn't know a stranger, okay?) Even all that being said, I wasn't under any ideas that we would get to Houston and Ben would just start connecting right off the cuff.

However, it wasn't but a few months we'd been here and he was meeting with one of our pastor's and another guy weekly. I was shocked, to say the least, but I was also extremely grateful God had already provided for him. I knew that Ben building a foundation was important because I knew that men struggle with building deep relationships since 1) they are men: men are typically not emotional like women and thus don't typically build great relationships very easily, and 2) relationships with other guys, good relationships, are put on the back burner because of the demands of their career.

I didn't want this to happen. So I prayed.

And when I sat to write this post, the realization of just how quickly God had answered my prayer hit me. I'm even more grateful now.

All of that to say, I encourage you to continually seek God's guidance in your marriage or relationship with your significant other, if you are in either life phase, but also to ask Him to build healthy relationships for you and your spouse daily. (And yes, if you aren't even dating yet, you can be praying that your future spouse is already surrounded by great, healthy, godly relationships.)

___________________________________________________________

Here are the rest of my posts from this 30 week series I've done on praying for my husband:

Week 1: Intro     Week 2: Starting with Me     Week 3: His Identity     Week 4: His Treasure

Week 5: His Sexuality   Week 6: His Hugs, Kisses, and "I love you"s  Week 7: His Achilles Heel

Week 8: His Battlefield  Week 9: What Cripples Everyone  Week 10: The Passion Inside

Week 11: A Confession  Week 12: His Choices  Week 13: His Health  Week 14: His Protection

Week 15: His Trials  Week 16: His Integrity  Week 17: His Reputation  Week 18: His Priorities

9/11: May We Never Forget

[image source]

I will never forget that day. Where I was: Sophomore year of high school American History - first period. What I was doing: taking notes as my teacher lectured. And how when we found out one of the World Trade Centers had been hit by a plane, we stopped what we were doing, and turned on the radio. Shortly after we found out our Librarian had turned on the Library TV. It was just down the hall. So we left to watch the news.

I watched live coverage of the second tower being hit. I was in so much shock I just stared, face in my hands, dumbfounded at the screen.

I really don't have words.

It still catches my throat and brings tears to my eyes.

What I can say is I hope we never forget the bravery of men and women who gave their lives that die. May we never forget how police officers, fire fighters, first responders didn't bail on their job that day, many giving their lives. May we never forget the "average" citizen who fought against the terrorism that day. May we never forget the event that affected so many families, causing them to lose loved ones.

And may it evoke within us a sense of pride for our nation, doing everything in our power to help keep it strong, to maintain the freedom that so many have fought and died for so that we might enjoy.

Never forget.

A Verse to Share

I don't have much to say on the verse I want to share. I'm sure I've read this verse before but it really struck a cord in my heart this time as I read it. It spoke straight to my heart because it so clearly states that which I want to do daily.

And actually, though I'm behind, by several verses (I posted 10 out of 12 verses that I've memorized alongside other Siestas [this link explains it in one of the right-side drop downs] who commited to memorizing scripture this year), I want to get back on track of memorizing scripture. I want my life to be permeated by the word from the Word and the Father. So I am commiting to again memorizing scripture.

Will I acheive the 24/24 I had originally intended? Only time will tell, but my main goal is to seek to deepen my relationship with Christ by consistenly hiding His word in my heart, mind, and soul.

Now without further delay...

"You shall follow the Lord your God and fear Him; and you shall keep His commandments, listen to His voice, serve Him, and cling to Him."

Deuteronomy 13:4 NASB

Mourn With Those Who Mourn

*I am forgoing my regular Monday post this week. My heart has been heavy with what I'm going to share in this post. As such, I felt led to skip the post for this week and will bring it back next week.*

Well, the title the last half of Romans 12:15 in the NIV translation:

"...mourn with those who mourn."

I personally like the NASB translation:

"...and weep with those who weep."

Though, I will say that for once I like how The Message puts it in plain English:

"...share tears when [your friends] are down."

I share the different translations of this verse because my heart has been heavy. So very heavy that, though my friends who are struggling with the reason I shed tears are at least 5 hours away, I have been sad, shedding tears, and fervently praying that God would hear their cries. And sometimes I wonder if I'm crazy for feeling this way over a situation that I have never been through, but then I'm reminded by scripture that we are supposed to enter into our friends pain just as much, if not more so, their joys.

And so I have allowed myself to mourn for my friends who are battling the tough, no-known-end road of infertility. I have found my heart screaming out to God, begging that He might work a miracle in favor of their deep desires to be a Mommy. I have wished I lived closer to each one so that I could just be there for them, listen to them vent whatever emotions they are feeling, which may very well be anger or jealousy of friends who aren't walking that road, cry with them if they are needing to cry from the sorrow the painful journey brings, because even though I cannot understand, I most certainly am able to let them find a healthy outlet for their emotions in being their friend and listening ear, as well as do my best to empathize with them. 

The word empathy is defined by Merriam-Webster as follows:

1. the imaginative projection of a subjective state into an object so that the object appears to be infused with it
2. the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner; also : the capacity for this

After reading that definition, it clearly describes what Romans 12:15 calls us to do. For anyone, in any situation.

*sigh*

I'm sort of speechless...wordless.

My heart just hurts. I fervently hope for those who are battling the road of infertility to see an end of it with the miracle of a child.

I share this because I think we all need to be sensitive to where those around us are in life.

Are they hurting? Mourn with them. Comfort them if the situation calls for it, but know that sometimes, many times comfort comes most through a hug or shared tears.

Are they joyful? Enter into their joy with them, even if you are battling feelings of jealousy or covetousness because of whatever is bringing them joy.

Are they angry? Allow them to feel that anger, to wade through it so that they can dig into the hurt that is causing the anger

Whatever they are feeling, enter into it with them.

That is being a friend.

Our Weekend [4 Days Late...again - Ha!]

You guys, my brain won't stop spinning. There are some heavy topics on my heart and mind right now. But I'm still wading through them. Trying to decide whether to share or if they are for my heart alone at this time.

Since I'm unsure if I should wade those waters with everyone or just with God, I'm going to give a quick synapses of our Labor Day weekend. It was really nice. so cram packed with activities and people I didn't get a nap and I just realized how large the bags under my eyes were in my bumpdate picture for this week. We enjoyed ourselves, don't get me wrong, but there was a moment I woke up on the way home to Ben batting his eyes, so I slapped him. (Please understand, I don't walk around hitting my husband. This man sleeps like a log thus it was the only way I knew to get him to open and keep open his eyes.) Just sayin' - that sort of gives a picture of how busy and sleepy we were all weekend. (Ummm...Ben wasn't sleepy until he sat down, however, I almost fell asleep standing up a couple of times.)

Anyway...

I don't have a ton of pictures to share, because our camera was forgotten when we went to meet with friends Sunday for lunch and packed Sunday evening, again with friends, and then Monday when we were with Ben's family. However, I did capture Zoë's first time feeding the ducks:

That Goose...oh, that Goose! Thankfully all it did was hiss, but you better believe I would have tried to smack it if it came any closer. 

I love that Zo-bug was able to experience baby ducks in her first feeding experience. So CUTE!

My precious sweet bug! She LOVED it so much!

Mama with her babies :)

Zoë with her Gigi and Daddy feeding the ducks.

Uncle Jacob is the best :) (I didn't get any with Aunt Laura. BOO!! :( ) They pointed to ducks. Zoë wanted to get in the water too! Ha!

Attempting to wriggle out of his arms for a dip. See those rosy cheeks? It was H-O-T!!

We laughed when we first got to the lake because before we could get out, the ducks were waddling to our car. Our car, you guys! They know what people mean. HAHA!

The rest of Saturday was spent with some of my side of the family. I was so glad to be able to see my Great Uncle and Aunt as well as my Grandmother. I unfortunately forgot the camera while they were there so I didn't get any pics of Zoë with her Great-Great Uncle & Aunt or her Great-Grandmother. :/

Zoë did have plenty of time to experiment with climbing stairs. By the time nap time was coming around on Saturday (so all of a half-day, mind you), she had figured out how to get up to the 3rd step.

She decided one of her shoes needed to be up a step :)

However, by the time she reached that step, she'd also realized just how sleepy she was and figured she might rest her head a little:

My cutie patootie

The rest of our afternoon was spent taking Zoë outside, hanging out, eating Cane's (YAY! The closest one here is about 30 minutes away, BOO!), and playing Settlers of Catan. (If you've never played, it seriously is one of the best games ever!) I did happen to catch a quick snapshot of my brother with his niece :)

Ride a horsy, ride a horsy, ride to town....

We also saw a frog while we were playing settlers. I'm not sure why, but I think frogs (not toads, please do not get those confused. Toads are gross.) are so stinkin' cool!

I have to say the weird capture of my reflection added a unique touch to this photo. Ha!

Laura, my sister, tried to catch it, but it was a fast frog :( No froggy capture for us.

Sunday we spent time with some of Ben's best friends, people he's remained friends with from High School. We enjoyed our time, headed back to my parent's for a quick nap, and the packed up to go hang out with more friends.

I have to say as great as Sunday evening was with our friends, it made me really sad that we had to leave our small group. I loved the small group we had back in Baton Rouge. Such a great group of genuine, Christ-seeking people. I have hope to find such here, we're already making connections, but I just was reminded of what we already had and were building that we have to rebuild here.

You guys, I had been in Baton Rouge a little over 4 years to get to that point. Relationships, especially Christ-centered and edifying ones, don't just happen over night. They take time. Lots and lots and lots of TIME. *sigh* I digress.

After group we headed to Ben's parents house where we spent some time with his parents and older sister before bed. (Ben's brother-in-law wasn't able to be there due to being on call for his job that weekend.) By 9 we hit the sack. Ben and I were both suffering from horrible allergies and had taken Benadryl. I don't think you could have woke Ben if the house was burning down. And it took me hearing a baby crying for a while before I bolted, with heart racing, wondering if I had missed my child crying for a while. (Zo-bug was has been teething for a while now and that night was no different. Poor baby :( )

Monday was spent getting ready, letting the kids play, and then we headed out to meet Ben's Aunts for lunch at Cracker Barrel. I'm not a huge fan, but I figured since that's where they picked and they had a wide variety of food, it would allow everyone to order something they liked. Though our time with them was short, we really enjoyed the time we were able to spend with them.

Sort of off topic, I wish I would have remembered to snap a picture of the adorable bag one of Ben's Aunts embroidered for Zoë. I would totally have her embroider stuff for the next baby if we didn't live so far away. I may still considering I know I will get great work from her. If you live in the Baton Rouge area, I would totally recommend her. Feel free to contact me and I can give you her e-mail she uses to be in touch with clients.

All in all, it was a weekend full of memories even though I am still catching up on sleep. Ha! Our time was definitely worth it.