she sits
weary from a long days work
she woke, eyelids heavy
with will to barely prop them open
now she wills herself to look through them
work still waiting
though kids lie fast asleep
bleary eyed

she sits
thankful for mercies anew
oh the moments she'd change!
mulitply the "i love you"s
ask Him bestow gentler tone
enjoy all discoveries new
instruct with loving guidance

she sits
hoping to grasp
if even a single moment
days turn to months
she cannot will time stop
each day seems steal sanity
little by little
yet surely there is a single moment

she sits
reminded faults teach forgiveness
grace and mercy too
finding triumph in the small
place to learn in the failure
knowing strength comes
only in Him
trust only Him

she smiles
all is not lost
weary and tired seem define all
yet there is beauty
He makes all things beautiful in there time
for some moments it is now
so this title comes not effortless
yet a most fulfilling call

she is Mother

I wrote this simply because I find myself many times wondering how I'm going to make it through each moment - the sticky fingers, the food thrown every where, the sparkling eyes asking "Did you really draw that line?" as a finger reaches out, the fussiness because of teeth cutting, the whining when something doesn't happen how she thinks or wants it to - to live and tell the next. Oh and did I mention that sometimes I completely see the horror of the moms you see on the news flash before my eyes in moments of sheer anger? And I can see me being that mom if I wasn't depending on God and reminding myself that I am the adult, not the child who needs instruction? (Yes. Maybe I am bold for typing that out on here, but my guess is that if you have kids or work with them consistently, some of you can completely relate to this.) Let me be clear that these are only horrid day dreams. I have not and will not, by God's continued grace and practicing healthy anger dispelling techniques, harm my child.

Thankfully, I'm learning to laugh at those moments. And truly see that we all still have that little child inside of us, she just actually acts it out because she knows no better. It helps me to look at it in a different light, sometimes giving me ideas on how to help her learn a different behavior. Or a better way to handle all those crazy emotions that she has yet to know what to do with them.

I also wrote this because I wanted to have a reminder for myself that though the days seem long and nights too short, it will all soon pass away. If I'm not careful to find the beauty in each moment of every day, I'm going to miss out on some of the best memories I could form with my daughter. And if I can't form that habit with the first, I find myself realizing that it will be even more a struggle to enjoy the moments if other little blessings make their way into our home. And if they don't, well then I will have missed out all together on what may be my only child.

Maybe this makes sense. Maybe it doesn't, but I needed to let the words take shape and form, even if it is the roughest poetry.

I sit reminded just how full and fully blessed my life is.

Texas Women Bloggers

No comments:

Post a Comment

I appreciate you taking time to comment :) I do not allow anonymous comments. Thank you for understanding!