Praying for Him: His Repentance

I'm a tad behind, so you may find me posting a few of these this week...if I find the time amidst packing and other normal life happening around these parts. I wasn't even aware how behind I was due to life being so crazy over here. I feel like it's just flying right by and I can't stop it if I want to, which part of me does considering it means I have less and less time to prepare for the newborn who will be welcomed into our home in no time flat.

Anyway, the point of this particular chapter was repentance.

Let me start by putting the definition out there, because I think we lightly throw this word around, missing the true depth of what we're saying, myself included many times.

re•pent•ance

/ri-'pen-tᵊn(t)s/

1. the action of repenting; sincere regret or remorse.

What gets me in the definition is the word sincere. Why? Well, let's look at it's definition:

sin•cere
/sin-'sir-, sən-/

1. having or showing true feelings
2. genuine or real: not false, fake, or pretended

So you can't feign repentance. You can say the words "I'm sorry" and not truly mean it, not truly care whether your behavior changes at all. But when it comes to repentance, for it to be classified as such, it must be sincere, which means there is no room for it to be feigned in any form or fashion.

Why did this strike a chord with me?

Because as much as I would love to say I only need to pray this for my husband in this area (Don't read too much into that last part, I'll get to him in a minute.), I desperately need the reminder apart from the Lord and His working in my life, there are many times I have no desire to change at. all. Is anyone with me? I'm willing to bet many of you have felt, are in the middle of, or will feel (It's likely all three are true.) this way at some point.

I lash out in anger with no remorse, no regret for how it affected the other person, because in the moment it felt good to uphold my pride a little longer. I choose to waste time doing something with no lasting importance over spending time in the word, when my heart has specfically been pressed to do so, with no desire to repent because it means giving up my worldly comfort for something that I know will challenge me in areas I may not want to face. I sit on moving forward with a decision I have specifically felt led by the Spirit to move forward with because I know it will stretch me far beyond my limits with no regret or desire to change because I know it will mean giving up something else I enjoy, even if it was something God had originally told me to do.

Do you see where I'm going with this?

Stormie's words of how praying for your spouse will really open doors of praying for yourself keep coming back to me (read the post for week 2 of this series) and (these are going to be my words now) I'm reminded how each of us should worry more about the log in our own eye before we start worrying about the speck in someone else's (reference to Matthew 7:5; I recommend reading 7:1-5 to get the big picture). And boy am I thankful for this reminder.

So when it comes to praying my spouse will be repentant, it's going to lead me to check my own heart first. It's going to help remind me that even if there is a situation where he hasn't truly repented yet, I myself have been found in the same place, could possibly be in the same place, giving me a compassion and grace only from God which might not have been there before. It's going to remind me as much as my husband may try to truly love me well or may be blind to a sin he is stuck in, my strength needs to come solely from depending on God alone and not finding his faults and begin picking at the wounds those faults have inflicted on him. And so this leads way to laying my pride down at the foot of the cross. (Which is why I said not to read into my statement about wishing I only had to pray for repentance in Ben; the statement was about my pride, not an "Oh! And you better believe I have to pray for his repentance!)

Maybe I'm rabbit trailing all over the place. My mind is a bit like that these days with the move close at hand, the pregnancy taking anything I have to offer, a toddler who is in full swing of making sure I'm learning the parenting ropes with her (No, that is not a jab at her. It's just a statement of how much she is currently testing limits set to see if I really mean them, a very normal phase of childhood and always present task of parenting.), and lots of life going on around all of those wonderful, yet taxing, situations.

Anyway, what I've "written" makes sense to me and has helped me process this chapter of praying for repentance in my spouse. What I've gained most is realizing the sensitivity needed in this area, praying from a heart not hardened or embittered but truly asking for the best my husband can have, which is a lifestyle encompassed by a repentant heart.

___________________________________________________________

Here are the rest of my posts from this 30 week series I'm doing on praying for my husband:

Week 1: Intro     Week 2: Starting with Me     Week 3: His Identity     Week 4: His Treasure

Week 5: His Sexuality   Week 6: His Hugs, Kisses, and "I love you"s  Week 7: His Achilles Heel

Week 8: His Battlefield  Week 9: What Cripples Everyone  Week 10: The Passion Inside

Week 11: A Confession  Week 12: His Choices  Week 13: His Health  Week 14: His Protection

Week 15: His Trials  Week 16: His Integrity  Week 17: His Reputation  Week 18: His Priorities

Week 19: His Relationships  Week 20: His Fatherhood  Week 21: What Can Haunt Us All

Week 22: A Daily Choice  Week 23: His Marriage Week 24: A Part of Him I Forget About

Week 25: Walking with Jesus  Week 26: Our Strongest Muscle, Our Greatest Weakness

The First Christmas Night [Book Review & Giveaway]

*The winner is Tracey D. Congrats, Tracey! Be looking for an e-mail. Please respond within 48 hours or a new winner will be chosen.*

You guys! I am so excited to be reviewing The First Christmas Night by Keith Christopher, Illustrated by Christine Kornacki. Plus, I get to giveaway one copy to one of you! Eeek!

I knew nothing about this book when I was first offered an opportunity to review it. All I knew was we love books in our home, I want to start Christmas traditions of our own around here, and I was told this book is The Night Before Christmas with a twist.

Now, I'm not sure about you, but I've always loved the sing-songy poetry of The Night Before Christmas. I was so excited to hear someone had taken the story of Jesus' birth and wrote it in prose appealing to a child. I wasn't even phased the age recommendation for this book is 4-8. Something in me knew it could appeal even to a 20 month old.

I was not disappointed.

In fact, Zoë has now made it a bed time ritual asking for "Jesus", by which she means she wants to read The First Christmas Night. And if she can get her hands on it during the day, even better! This makes my heart leap for joy as she is constantly being exposed to the story of our Savior's birth. She is constantly being exposed to the reminder He came down to earth as baby - helpless, completely dependent on someone else. Though the story may not reach that far with her now, laying the foundation through a book constantly exposing her to the truth of the beginning of what He did for us brought me to tears on a couple of occasions as we read it together.

And I mean, look at her saying cheese for the camera. But that book, it won't be easily taken from her hands, not that I generally try to. Even the pictures appeal to her, which isn't her general "go to" in a book. She'll look but quickly pass them up. I've found her closely inspecting the art work in this book at times.

Which leads me to how much I love the art work. Kornacki really does an excellent job of drawing images appealing to all ages! Even my artist husband has a high appreciation for the workmanship throughout.

I am almost certain this book has made it's debut into our Christmas traditions for years to come. I'm not even sure I'll be allowed to stow it away after Christmas is passed.

And because I'm about honesty, as is the sponsoring company, I want you guys to know there was only one aspect of the book which slightly bothered me: if you're keen on historical accuracy, the three wise men didn't find Jesus until he was around two years of age. However, the book portrays the typical story we we hear where the shepherds and wise men find Jesus while he is a new born.

Other than that, I give this book a raving review from our household! I'm pretty sure many of you would love to get your hands on a copy.

Speaking of which, one of you can get your hands on a free copy by entering my giveaway!

I have one copy of The First Christmas Night to give away. The giveaway is open to US residents with a physical address (no P.O. boxes, sorry!) age 18 and up. It begins today, Tuesday, November 19, at 12 am CST, and will close on Monday, December 2, at 12 am CST. The only mandatory entry for the giveaway is to leave a blog comment; I would love if you'd answer this question: Do you have any Christmas Traditions you have carried over or started with your family? If so, what? The winner will be randomly selected via Rafflecopter. They will be announced in an addendum at the top of this post, as well as on the Rafflecopter form, within 48 hours of the giveaway's close. I will also contact them via e-mail. (Please ensure you use a valid, working e-mail address to enter with on the Rafflecopter form.) The winner will have 48 hours to contact me via e-mail at mylifestidbits@gmail.com to claim their prize. I will need the winners full name and physical  address to forward to giveaway sponsor so they can mail the winner their prize. For any other information regarding giveaways hosted on my blog, please visit the official giveaway page.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

"Disclosure of Material Connection: I received one or more of the products or services mentioned above for free in the hope that I would mention it on my blog. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."

27 Weeks [A Bumpdate]

How Far Along: I am 27 weeks and 5 days. 86 days until I'm 40 weeks.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: According to my home scale I didn't gain or lose any this past week, so I'm still hovering around the 16/17 pound gain. I'm so not complaining as this will mean I will likely gain closer to the lower end. Less for me to lose after! 

Food Aversions (and "no nos"): Still Bananas. There was some other food someone mentioned which made my stomach churn at the thought of it. However, it obviously didn't leave to great an impact or I'm not around it much as I can't remember what on earth it was. I just know I almost threw-up the moment it was mentioned. Glad I'm not around it enough to remember. 

Gimme' some of that!: This week would be the first where I had several cravings, some of them more specific than others. I still have the general strong desire for sweets on a consistent basis. Thankfully, because it's so nonspecific, I can generally find a way around it without eating too much. My fear would be going through my entire cabinet in search for the right sweet every time only to find myself gaining way too much weight. So for my ability to curb it or ignore it, I am very grateful. However, I had three cravings this week, one of them still popping up quite frequently.

My first was for ice cream. And I had a general idea of what I wanted but wasn't sure until Ben ran to the store for me, called, and started listing ice cream. Moolinnium Crunch. Thank you, Blue Bell! It hit. the. spot! No joke.

Then I really started getting a hankering for potatoes. And to specificy, baked potato skins done to a good crisp with some potato left on them, melted cheese, a little salt, and some pepper. Oh my! I could go for some as I type this. It just sounds soo stinking good! And every time I eat it I find myself wishing I could just shovel an entire plate full down my throat. YUM!

And finally, I have really wanted a cookie. I wasn't sure exactly what kind, I just knew I wanted a soft, chewy cookie with some chocolate in it. And because we're moving, I don't have everything within arms reach to make said cookies. So off to the store Ben went. And he brought home some yummy, soft, chewy, Sam's Chocolate Chip Cookies to be exact. Perfecto!

How I Feel: Exhausted! Health wise I'm pretty good. I will say with the weather change and the lack of dusting done around here my allergies are going to kill me before my time has come. And I can actually say the dusting isn't my fault, though the fact it gets done at all every couple of months is a huge blessing. (I'm so allergic it does me in for days to dust. My hubby graciously takes on that house chore, for which I am forever grateful.) My sinuses have been stuffed for at least the past week and to top it off my eyes are about ready to pack up and leave with all the itching, watering, and swelling they've seen over the past week. Packing boxes with items not dusted for a while equals multiple types of torment for me. C'est la vie.

Maternity Clothes: Nothing has changed here. There are days I desperately want to wear just a plain t-shirt, but none of mine will go over the bump enough to cover it. Also, I can't usually borrow my hubby's shirts because he's so lean his shirts don't really completely cover my bump either. Darn marrying a man who almost weighs less than my prepregnancy weight! (I tell him not to talk about his weight. It's just not fair...)

Movement: She's a pretty consistent mover, by which I mean I can almost book it to the minute when she'll move. I'm even thinking I know when she'll wake in the MOTN, which is very different from Zoë. However, I'm wondering if it's more because I am a lighter sleeper than I was before we had Zoë. Even when she's moving in the wee hours I've never thought it was all crazy. Just normal baby-in-utero movements. 

Sleep: I'm feeling like I"m never getting enough of it. Seriously. And I know it's not helping I haven't been able to lie down to rest while Zoë is napping. My body is really tired, though I know it's because sweet Aubrey is growing. I mean, shoot, look at the pictures! Ha!

What I Miss: Being more interactive with Zoë. She's constantly wanting me to chase her, but I get winded so easy I don't last very long. Thankfully she enjoys just sitting and reading or me being close to her and not doing anything else, though it isn't always what she wants. 

What I'm Looking Forward To: You may be tired of the broken record, but as I'm slowly getting past the due date of the baby I miscarried this past March, all I can think is "Thank you, Jesus, for allowing sweet Aubrey to still be growing, healthy, as far as we know, and in utero where she should be right now." As many times as I find myself wanting to complain about the discomforts I feel, I'm always quickly reminded I'd much rather feel them than be aching from another loss. 

Favorite Moment of the Week: This past week what stands out is I had two seperate friends who have helped me in different ways with the move. One came to watch Zoë while I packed boxes, though I will say it was hard to focus on packing when I had a friend in the other room and our little girls were interacting with one another. So, so sweet! And then another friend came and packed up her van with boxes and helped me bring a load over to the new place. So grateful for friends who offer to help me with this big task!

26 Weeks [A Bumpdate]

This week I have no picture to post. I figure I'm doing

well considering I refused to take weekly pics for

Zoë. And I was on a retreat all weekend, which is my

reason for not having said picture :)

How Far Along: I am 26 weeks and 5 days. 93 days until I'm 40 weeks.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: According to my home scale, I've gained a total of 16/17 pounds. It fluctuates, sometimes daily, so I guess we'll see what the "official" gain is when I see my OB in a couple weeks.

Food Aversions (and "no nos"): Bananas. I'm starting to think the aversion will not leave me for the entirety of this pregnancy.

Gimme' some of that!: Not sure why, but I really wanted a grilled cheese sandwich last night. That would be craving #2.

How I Feel: Well, right now I'm exhausted. I went on a women's retreat this weekend, which was great but drained me of every last ounce of energy I had. I will say I think my body has finally caught up with the lack of iron it needed as I'm not really feeling sluggish anymore. Now I just need to get my body back on track with the "normal" pregnancy fatigue.

Maternity Clothes: This hasn't changed...well, actually I'm thinking I'm going to have to buy at least one more pair of pants for myself because two of the pairs I have to wear don't have as much stretch as some maternity jeans and my thighs are not loving them. Oh well!

Movement: Yep! And it's starting to get alien-like, where I see a bump move across my belly. Ben can easily feel where Aubrey is pushing, which means it's getting a little uncomfortable for me when she decides to really press into me. :)

Sleep: Umm...hit and miss. And the retreat didn't really help with this either.

What I Miss: My hips not popping every time I move.

What I'm Looking Forward To: Making it another week. And I'm also starting to look forward to being with my family for Thanksgiving. PLUS, we're going to Arkansas this year. I miss the beauty of it. I frequently tell Ben if he's going to take me from Texas I'd be ok as long as the transfer is to NW AR. 

Favorite Moment of the Week: Maybe because I'm exhausted, or maybe because I'm purely soaking in the blessing of another week of pregnancy behind me, but I honestly don't have a specific moment standing out from the rest this past week. I'm ok with that :)

King's Faith [DVD Review & Giveaway]

*This giveaway is now closed. Kristy Love be looking for an e-mail: you won! Thank you to all who participated. Giveaways don't happen without entrants :)*

Well, I'm wetting my toes: I've never reviewed a movie before. I'll also go ahead and tell you I generally do not view "Christian" movies; almost every movie in our home, whether rented or purchased, is a main stream, Hollywood production. That being said, I knew that I couldn't compare this movie to anything mainstream; this is a small budget film.  I also have only seen one small budget film I'm aware of and it was ages ago. So what you will get is purely my thoughts on the movie itself. (Also, I'd like you to know any "commercial" info in this review is not required of me for my review; I chose to relay it to you in order to help you consider enterting the giveaway and/or purchasing the film.)

Let me start with the info on the back of the case:

About KING'S FAITH
Eighteen foster homes. Nine arrests. One life-changing moment.
After Brendan King's life spiraled to rock bottom, the teen found hope in a new relationship with Christ while serving time in a juvenile penetentiary. Recently released from prison, Brendan finds solace in the foster home of a couple struggling with suppressed grief.
As the city-bred teen enrolls at a suburban high school, he finds support from a group of believers. Yet the bonds of his old way of life - and the gang that wants to know where he hid their stash on a long-ago night - are strong. In his darkest moment, Brendan found faith. Now he must decide if it's worth the price to hold on to it.
KING'S FAITH is produced by DiBella and Faith Street Film Partners LLC, a Rochester, NY-based collective of filmmakers, churches, investors, and supporters.

Let me first say adoption and fostering both always pull at my heart strings. Though I'm not completely active in helping with either at this time, I'm always asking, praying, hoping to be more heavily involved in ministries with such. I think, at this time, it comes more from me than from Ben, but he is not opposed to the idea of either and we sometimes dream of actually doing one or the other, though we both definitely enjoy helping however we can in our current circumstances with both. Thus, when I received the e-mail to review this, I knew I wanted to see what kind of story was woven in this film.

I was, however, a little skeptical of what the acting would be like. The only other "Christian" film I've ever seen left much to be desired when it came to the acting. However, King's Faith had decent acting. Again, it's no Hollywood film, but I felt I could genuinely connect with the characters and felt as though they portrayed their parts well. How they spoke their lines, the expressions they used, the interactions with other characters, even the non-speaking parts really brought you in to a story. Needless to say, I was impressed.

I enjoyed watching it as it is a pretty mellow movie with a few mildly intense scenes scattered throughout. It is rated PG-13 for violence, drug content, and thematic events; I wouldn't show this to a young child, but a pre-teen would possibly enjoy it and I think it is laced with a ton of great conversational bits for those of you with older children. Though every kid is different, and there may possibly be a pre-teen who shouldn't watch this, I personally believe I would love to sit with my kids to watch this and discuss it when they are older.

It is full of so many great themes, opening doors for discussion on topics such as grace, forgiveness, how our choices affect us, testing of faith. Here is one quote which stuck with me and is a big theme throughout: "If you stand firm in your faith, anything is possible." But one of the reasons I love this quote is because Brendan's life doesn't become easy simply by him choosing faith before he was released from the penitentiary. And the life of the couple who fosters him isn't a cake walk either.

For those of you familiar with these movies, it was described to me as a cross between "Fireproof" and "To Save a Life". Though I'm not familiar with either of those movies, I heard great reviews on "Fireproof". I will personally say I'm not sure I will frequently watch "King's Faith" but I know it will not sit on my DVD shelf and simply collect dust. (Let me be honest, I have very few "go to" movies which I watch on a regular basis. So the fact it will not collect dust, like some movies I own, is a testament to the fact this movie is worth watching, in my opinion.)

And in order to keep from completely giving the movie away, I'll wrap up the review there. Now, on to the giveaway (YAY!):

I have one copy of KING'S FAITH to give away. The giveaway is open to US residents with a physical address (no P.O. boxes, sorry!) age 18 and up. It begins today, Tuesday, November 5, at 12 am CST, and will close on Sunday, November 16, at 12 am CST. The only mandatory entry for the giveaway is to leave a blog comment; I would love if you'd answer this question: What are your thoughts on discussing drug use with pre-teens and teens? The winner will be randomly selected via Rafflecopter. They will be announced in an addendum at the top of this post, as well as on the Rafflecopter form, within 48 hours of the giveaway's close. I will also contact them via e-mail. (Please ensure you use a valid, working e-mail address to enter with on the Rafflecopter form.) The winner will have 48 hours to contact me via e-mail at mylifestidbits@gmail.com to claim their prize. I will need the winners full name and physical  address to forward to giveaway sponsor so they can mail the winner their prize. For any other information regarding giveaways hosted on my blog, please visit the official giveaway page.


a Rafflecopter giveaway

"Disclosure of Material Connection: I received one or more of the products or services mentioned above for free in the hope that I would mention it on my blog. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."

25 Weeks [A Bumpdate]

Maybe it's just me, but I feel like I'm ginormous in this pic, as compared to last week. I felt like I'd grown a lot just before it.Who knows...

How Far Along: I am 25 weeks and 5 days. 100 days until I'm 40 weeks. (Ummm..DO WHAT!? 100 days sounds so much smaller than "less than 15 weeks" or "3 months" [4 if you're counting lunar months, which is why care providers say 10 months]. I just remember how quickly it counts down from here...woah!)

Total Weight Gain/Loss: I bought a scale, but it's not here yet, so 14 at my last appointment, though I'm guessing she's grown, my body has "grown", and thus I've gained.

Food Aversions (and "no nos"): Still only bananas.

Gimme' some of that!: No true cravings.

How I Feel: Sluggish, but I'm hoping that will change once my body starts responding to the iron I have to take. I found out I'm anemic, which didn't really surprise me as I was with Zoë too. I'm also thankful I PASSED my glucose test with flying colors! My nurse said my blood sugar was "Great!". Yah hoo!

Maternity Clothes: Yep. Or really comfy yoga pants or "nice" sweat pants :) Of course maternity tops. Or my husband's tees.

Movement: Mmmmm. My only savored part of pregnancy. It's nice too she isn't a crazy mover. Just kicks and some elbow jabs every now and then. No ninja style or insanely strong punches or kicks. I do feel her turn over frequently...really weird considering all the amniotic fluid moving with her.

Sleep: You think I'd sleep well with my anemia draining me, but I'm not. Also, my back is really starting to give me problems making it hard to sleep. I may start couch sleeping soon.

What I Miss: Easily getting comfortable in bed. Not having to think about how to maneuver myself out of bed or put my pants on or squat to pick up anything from the floor (bending over is bad with all the extra weight on my front...not to mention the balance issues this causes).

What I'm Looking Forward To: Another week closer to full term!!

Favorite Moment of the Week: This has absolutely nothing to do with the pregnancy, but it made my whole freakin' week:

So God blessed our search in finding an apartment and it is one we are able to take our time moving into because the lease begins before our current lease ends. A huge blessing after last years move to Texas! Well, Saturday we headed to the new place to work on the dreaded inventory of living area papers. At one point I was sitting inspecting our kitchen cabinets, when out of no where, Zoë comes running up to me, huge grin taking over her sweet face, saying "Awww!", with outstretched arms. The second she was close enough, she threw herself at me, wrapped her tiny, precious arms as tight around my neck as she could, and proceeded to give me a huge, long, head-sweetly-nestled-on-my-shoulder hug! My mommy heart wanted time to stop and simultaneously melted into a puddle right there on the floor! And it wasn't for any other reason than to give me a hug! Ahhhhh! This job of mothering a child is so unbelievably hard and yet so ridiculously rewarding even if moments like that are infrequent. And to know I will soon have another, though daunting at times, makes my heart swell, which is crazy considering I still feel it will burst from loving Zoë and can't imagine it not bursting by adding another child for it to swell over. Gah, I feel so blessed!!